


The Toy Box

by trylonandperisphere



Series: The Toy Box [2]
Category: Orphan Black (TV)
Genre: F/F, Fluff, Fluff and Smut, Romance, Smut
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2014-09-22
Updated: 2017-11-21
Packaged: 2018-02-18 08:59:51
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 6
Words: 33,920
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2342681
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/trylonandperisphere/pseuds/trylonandperisphere
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Taking a pause while some lovely folks beta my other Cophine work-in-progress, so I thought I'd get back to some smutty romance.  This is nominally in the same future AU as Cosima's Secret.  It's rated M, starting out somewhat smutty and probably will later turn into a series of more raunchy vignettes.  Thanks for reading, and let me know what you think!</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Part I

**Part I**

Delphine was doing it again. That thing with the wide eyes and the catch of her lower lip in her teeth. Well, she did that a lot, but this was not in the ways Cosima liked, as in the I'm-stimulated-and-getting-turned-on kind of way, or even the I'm-thinking-about-important-matters-that-concern-me way, but more the something-is-bothering-me-and-making-me-too-nervous-to-speak kind of way. It was the extra wide puppy eyes that tipped her off. You couldn't miss 'em.

Delphine had been doing that quite a lot over the last few days, and Cosima finally decided to call her on it, since the concerned looks and "are you okay"s hadn't done the trick.

"Okay, baby, tell me what's up," she nudged, sitting beside her lovely girlfriend on the couch and bumping her with her shoulder. Delphine kept looking at the reports from work she was reading, clearly purposefully, trying to pretend nothing was wrong.

"Eum, it's just the latest trials with the neural tissue growth," Delphine answered, her voice a bit tight. "We can't seem to get the proper scaffolding at that size..."

Cosima rolled her head to the side, giving her the stop-shitting-me look. She reached out and gently pushed the papers down onto Delphine's lap.

"That's sad, but you know that's not what I meant." She rested her hand on her lover's forearm and stroked it softly with her thumb. "Something has been bothering you, I can tell. And if it's something you're trying so hard not to talk about, I'm pretty sure that means it's something we actually  _should_ talk about, sooner rather than later."

Delphine sighed. She loved how observant, caring and insightful Cosima was, but sometimes it made it hard to keep a secret or a thought she was still working on to herself.

"It's nothing, really," she replied, and patted Cosima's hand, "I've just had a lot on my mind, lately. Some things I'm figuring out."

"Hmm," Cosima responded, with a quick narrowing of her eyes. "You're going to make me play Go Fish, aren't you? Not to get all up in your business, but I can tell when it's about something between us, and you know not talking about it just makes you stew and me nervous - not to mention a little annoyed. So, out with it, Cormier." She poked a finger into Delphine's side, giving it a little wiggle-tickle. "Expert problem-solver, at your service."

Delphine put down her papers and pushed her hair to the other side of her face. Her lip caught in her teeth again, and Cosima silently pointed at it, making Delphine roll her eyes.

"Alright, I'm okay. It's just that... you know how wonderful things have been, between you and I, especially since you've been better. And living with you, in our own home, in peace... it's just been a dream come true."

Cosima nodded, hand under her chin.

"Yes, it has, baby. For me, too. But you sound like there's a 'but' in there."

Delphine's hand went through her hair again, eyebrows rising, trying to properly express herself, but obviously still hesitant.

"Non, non non non," she insisted, her French kicking in. "It  _is_ like a dream. It i _s_  wonderful. And I've been so happy. It's just that... I worry. I... want you to be happy, too."

Cosima looked at her, wishing she could wrap a string around whatever it was that Delphine was fumbling with and yoink it out like a bad tooth. She laid a hand on her girlfriend's thigh.

"Delphine, baby, I  _am_  happy.  _So_  happy and  _so_  in love with you. It seems like you're the one that's worked up."

Delphine raised her hands as if she was about to say something, then put them down again. Her face was screwing up in nervous concentration.

"I know, mon amour, and I love you, too, but..."

Cosima straightened, nodding at the "but" and waiting for the truth to come out.

"... but sometimes I wonder, if you are happy with... how we... how I make love with you."

Cosima's brow now also screwed into furrows. What the hell was she talking about? She felt almost mad, as if her lover, who at this point had learned more ways to seduce her and given her enough orgasms that she thought she might actually be bordering on addiction, had suddenly forgotten it. Was this a crisis of confidence? What in the Flying Spaghetti Monster's name would make this amazing, sexy woman...?

Cosima's hand tightened on Delphine's thigh, and her eyes widened.

"Waaaaait a minute..." She held up a finger, counting back days since Delphine had started seeming off, somehow. "Is this about the other night? When you came home and I was..."

Cosima remembered Delphine's little "oh!" as she had walked into the bedroom. Delphine had been at work at all hours working on some projects for a conference, and had only made it home to sleep, shower, and have a few running meals. Cosima had tried to get her to take some time to relax, but she had just apologized, and said it would only be bad for a couple weeks, but she needed to work overtime until the materials were finished, and then she would surely spend some down time with her love. Then, inevitably, she'd fall dead asleep on the couch with a report or on her desk spread with papers, and Cosima would shuffle her into bed, where they would both conk out for the night. It wasn't like Cosima wasn't working hard, either. She just had decided after nearly dying that she would take a job that allowed her a little more time to stop and smell the flowers, as it were. Now the flower was all closed up or out of the garden most of the time, and Cosima had to entertain herself.

So, it was that night that she'd been noodling around and reading some particularly erotic sci-fi fanfic, when she decided to scratch her itch. Delphine came home earlier than expected, and Cosima didn't hear her come in, because she had her earbuds in playing music, plus she was busy with a vibrator inside her and a hand on her clit, releasing a little tension. When Delphine came in, the little "oh!" happened, and Cosima had opened her eyes and gave a somewhat less concerned "oh" of her own, and then had started laughing.

"Well, hi there. I didn't expect you to come home at this time," she chuckled, her cheeks tinting as she turned off the vibrator and pulled the sheet slightly over herself so she could assume a less compromising position. Delphine wasn't laughing, though. Delphine looked embarrassed.

"I'm... so sorry," she responded, then paused and began taking off her coat hurriedly. "I didn't mean to interrupt you. I just... need to go to the bathroom and then I'll give you some time-"

"Hey, my little  _cherie,"_  Cosima interjected, her voice reassuring, her French accent still bad. "Don't worry about it. In fact, if you'd like to come join me..." She wiggled her eyebrows.

Delphine paused a moment, seeming flustered, and then came and leaned over to give Cosima a small kiss, then straightened up.

"I don't mean to be rude, but to tell the truth, I'm so very tired. I just wanted to take a hot shower and get some sleep." Her voice and expression were both apologetic.

"Okay, no worries," Cosima answered, and then poked Delphine's leg when the drooping woman still seemed uncertain. "Delphine, it's  _fine_. I know you're exhausted. I'll just finish up while you're in the shower, and then we both can get some rest."

Delphine nodded, but her gaze was on a shape under the top sheet.

"I, euh," she started, "I didn't know you had one of these." She waved a hand loosely at the elongated lump beside Cosima's leg.

Cosima blinked, smiled, and then pulled out the vibrator, all eleven, wavy, glittery inches of it.

"What, this? Yeah, well, this one's just an oldie-but-goodie, I guess. Not my best, but I find it familiar..."

"You have more?" Delphine asked, eyebrows rising.

"Oh yeah, I... well, I guess we've never really talked about this, yet. I just figured we would at some point." She blushed slightly, a sly grin proving any shyness was minor. "But I'd be happy to show you my toy box, if you show me yours."

Delphine licked her lips, then nodded.

"Right. Okay, my love. Some other time, maybe..." She was backing up. "I'm just going to go into the bathroom, now."

Cosima thought about Delphine's reaction for a moment after the door clicked shut. Was Delphine really embarrassed? Should  _she_  be embarrassed? She knew that Delphine had been sexually experienced, with men, before they got together, and she also knew that Delphine had taken to sex with her eagerly, quickly, like a fish to water. Her girlfriend had always seemed to have a certain  _laissez-faire_  attitude toward the subject of sex that Cosima had assumed was just something... French. Delphine had even taken to pleasuring herself in front of her when Cosima had been too sick to physically participate, although that had been at Cosima's request.

Delphine's voice came quietly through the door, over the sound of the shower. She was humming to herself. That was normal.

Cosima mentally shrugged and figured they'd explore the topic more later, but right then she really did want to finish what she had been doing. A few minutes later and she removed the pillow that had absorbed her final moans from her face. She dropped the vibrator unceremoniously off the bed and felt a wave a warm, contented sleepiness wash over her.

By the time Delphine came out - which did seem to take a while - Cosima had turned out the light and was dozing. Cosima felt her love slide under the covers and instinctively rolled over to snuggle up to her. Delphine laid a kiss on her forehead, stroked her back and settled down.

Cosima had really meant to address the subject again, but things had just gotten so darned busy for both of them. And, being Cosima, she was easily distracted. After all, that Rune Wars competition had been in _tense._ And things had been pretty normal, considering Delphine was at the lab so much.

But maybe things hadn't been entirely normal, after all.

Cosima saw Delphine's pupils dip in a sort of confused pain, and couldn't believe how clueless she had been.

"Aw, honey. Del _phine, no._  Tell me you haven't been thinking I've been masturbating because I'm not happy with our sex life? I mean, yeah, there hasn't been as much of it as I would like  _lately,_  but you have to know how wonderful and amazing and sexy I find you in bed - all the time!"

Her hands were on Delphine's shoulders now, and her girlfriend gave a small nod, before worrying at her lip once more and pushing out her words.

"I, I know that it's absolutely normal to masturbate. I know that I haven't been around much, I haven't been attentive. But I also did not know you liked... toys so much. And I never asked you. And I never had that much experience with them, because..." she shrugged, her eyes shifting, roaming to look away at something else, at nothing. "I guess, in the past, what I did was... pretty straightforward."

Cosima gave her a look.

"You did not just say  _straight_ -forward, for reals, did you?" She gave a little snort and took Delphine's hand, tugging on it until her beloved turned back to meet her eyes from beneath a blonde curtain of curls.

"Delphine, listen to me. I  _love_  the way you make love to me. You make me feel better than I ever have." She squeezed her hand. "I hoped we'd gotten through this after I apologized for what I said after our first time. You know I was mad at the time."

Delphine nodded again, giving Cosima's hand a squeeze in return, but still giving her those full-on sad puppy eyes.

"So, maybe we have different experiences in the past with sexual expression," Cosima continued. "I guess I've always been pretty comfortable about anything, and had more exposure to some things, so I kind of took for granted that having something of a collection of toys was like, a thing." She stroked Delphine's face. "But I never want you to feel embarrassed or uncomfortable with me, and I never want you to be afraid that I'm not one hundred percent satisfied and delighted with the ways we make love, okay?"

"Mm," Delphine replied, a small, relieved smile playing at her lips. "Okay."

"And like, jilling off is  _totes_ different from being with someone. You know that."

Delphine let out a small laugh.

"'Jilling off?' You almost lost me for a second, on that one."

"Mm. I was fantasizing about you while I did it, too, I forgot to mention."

"Oh, really? And what were you thinking?" Delphine shifted closer.

"I had been reading something and... nevermind. Let's just say I was imagining you in a show with 'Star' in the title, and you'd look really great in a shiny, skin-tight outfit."

Delphine chuckled. They both leaned in, forehead to forehead, and shared a soft kiss.

"Thank you,  _mon amour._ And, euh, if there's anything else you ever want to try, or want me to do, I want to learn about it. Any... toys, or whatever. I just want to share with you, give you pleasure."

Cosima smiled. "Of course. I really did just think it was something we hadn't gotten to, yet. I wasn't waiting or worried or anything. I've been  _very_ pleasured."

"Good. I have, as well. So much," Delphine answered.

They sat for a moment, cozy, holding each other, smiling softly.

"I even did some... research," Delphine offered. "I've been looking at stores and online articles and things. But there was just so much, and I wasn't sure how to start, with you."

"Aw. That's my sweet scientist. Doing research," Cosima smiled wider, giving her a squeeze. Delphine let our a little hum of pleasure as they relaxed more into the couch.

A few moments passed. Cosima cleared her throat. She was too curious.

"But, um... you really don't have any toys, or anything? Not even a vibrator?"

"Ah, well, yes," Delphine responded, "I do have one of those."

Cosima's tongue snuck out from between her teeth as she grinned.

"Can I  _see_ it?"

A quick eyeroll and a fond look from Delphine later, they made their way into the bedroom. Delphine reached into the top shelf of the closet ("aha! I'm too short to get up there!" Cosima accused,) and pulled out a small box. She almost blushed again, but then realized how comfortable she did feel with Cosima, and how much she loved sharing with her, including during sex. She pulled the lid off.

Cosima looked at the small, plastic item inside. There was a pause.

" _Really_ , Delphine?" she finally asked, unable to hold it back. "What does that take, a  _watch_ battery?"

Delphine's look turned from one of warmth to a particularly French stink-eye.

"What? I'm just  _saying,_ " Cosima flailed, trying to defend herself. "Honey, girl,  _no_. Listen, you know what one of the greatest things about 'crazy science' is?"

"I'm sure you're going to tell me," Delphine smirked, recognizing their code words, and waiting for the kicker.

"'Crazy science' isn't just about  _researching_ ," Cosima grinned, tugging Delphine closer. "It's about  _experimenting_ , too." She brushed her lips against her girlfriend's, adding a brief stroke of the tip of her tongue. Delphine's mouth curved into a smile.

"And I think," Cosima teased, her hands slipping down to cup Delphine's ass, "that we have a lot of experimenting to do. For science, of course."

"For science," Delphine teased back, grabbing the waistline of Cosima's skirt and pulling her pelvis against her own. "And, for orgasms."

"Ah, yes," Cosima murmured nipping at Delphine's neck. " _Touché,_  Doctor Cormier. To boldly go..."

Delphine gave her a small hit on the shoulder, and they stopped talking, finding other things to do with their mouths.


	2. Part II

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which the toy box is explored, and someone assaults a sea mammal.

How could there be a whole sweater box of _gadgets érotique_ under their bed and Delphine hadn’t known? 

 _(“Really?”_ Cosima asked her, her mouth pulling askew in that teasing way of hers.

“I thought it was,” Delphine argued, with an abbreviated gallic shrug, _“sweaters!”_ )

Now they were sitting on the floor, Cosima bearing an expression part amusement, part what seemed to be fond remembrance, and Delphine was trying to take it all in.

“Why would you need,” Delphine paused to mentally count, “five vibrators?”  Cosima laughed.

“Well, it’s not like I bought them all at the _same time,_ ” she answered, waving her hands.  “Sometimes you just want to try different things, to see if you like them, or if you’re in a different mood, you know?  Like, this one has a constant, strong vibration, and that other one has settings where it pulses.  And six.”

Delphine nodded.   _Pulses,_ she was thinking.  Then she paused.

“’Six?’”

“Yeah,” Cosima shrugged, then gestured over her shoulder, “counting the big one.”

Delphines eyes moved to the closet shelf where a large, double-headed massager waited, she had thought, innocently.

“But Cosima!”  She couldn’t conceal her shock.  “That is a _sports_ massager.  You use it on your back or limbs when they are tight and pulled.  It… it _rumbles_.”

The entire tip of Cosima’s tongue was poking from between her grinning teeth, now.

“Yeah, and?  You can use it for both.  Post-workout, or _for_ a workout.”

Delphine’s face was a baffled, concerned reflection of her internal processing.  She was beginning to wonder if Cosima wasn’t going to pull out a jackhammer next.

Cosima was, perhaps, enjoying this conversation too much.

“You are _so, cute_ ,” she teased her girlfriend, reaching over to pinch/tickle her side, then leaning in to kiss the corner of her mouth.  Delphine let out a sigh.

“Listen,” Cosima soothed her, taking her hand and stroking it with her thumb, “we’re just looking, having fun.  None of this indicates anything I want from you, and none of it indicates anything you have to like or do. I have my feelings and body, and you have yours.  We can share whatever we like of them, and the rest—“ she made a gesture cutting through the air with her other hand, wiping things clear between them.

Delphine was quiet for a moment, then pursed her lips.

“… is negotiable,” she said.

“Huhn?”  It was Cosima’s turn to be confused.

“The rest, everything, is negotiable.  Maybe we are not comfortable with some things right away, but we talk about it and we, _experiment_ , as you said, and we see what we like, and what we enjoy doing because it gets the other person really,” she paused and pulled her lover’s hand to hers, kissing her fingers, _“hot.”_ At that word, Delphine curled her tongue to pull Cosima’s index finger into her mouth and sucked gently on it from the lowest knuckle to the pad.  A smile formed around the finger as Cosima’s mouth dropped open and eyes darkened, and Delphine gave a playful, squeezing nip to the tip.

“Guh,” Cosima answered eloquently.  Now Delphine giggled.

Cosima’s eyes narrowed.

“Doctor _Cormieeerrr_ …”

Far less rattled, Delphine poked around further in the box.

“Is this a… tiny feather duster?”  she asked, picking up one item.

Cosima shook her head and snapped out of it.

“Uh, sort of.  It came with this bottle of, like, this flavoured powder?  A girl I was seeing got it.  You’re supposed to dust this powder on each other and then, like, lick it off, because it’s really sweet, or something.  But that just got sticky.”  She shrugged.  “I did like the tickle of the feathers, though.”

Delphine raised an eyebrow at her. 

“Noted.”  She felt somewhat relieved that everything in the box wasn’t going to involve getting stronger, harder, faster, and more intense, to the point of mechanization. She could accept her lover having a higher tolerance for vibration than her, but she didn’t want to feel inadequate.  “What about this?”  She held up what looked like a bright orange, plastic, horse pill.

“Oh,” Cosima took it from her and pulled it apart into two halves.  She squeezed the hollow ends a couple times.  “Put out your finger.”

Delphine did as she was told and Cosima pressed one of the hollow ends to her finger pad, squeezing slightly, until it stuck there by suction.  There was a pause, then Delphine looked up for clarification.  Cosima popped the item off her finger, and touched the swollen, red circle where it had been.

“See that?” She pointed, probing the spot.  “The blood rushes in.  Gets the area sensitive.”  She looked up into Delphine’s eyes.  “Think nipples,” she finished, wiggling her eyebrows.

Delphine felt her face flush.  The blood was rushing to her nipples just thinking about it.

“They’re okay,” Cosima shrugged, pushing both halves back together.  “I just never found it very sexy using something that looks kinda like traffic cones for your…”

She was about to put the device back in the box, when Delphine reached out and stopped her.  Cosima’s eyes flew up again, and she gauged the look on her lover’s face.

“… or maybe they really, _really_ , could be.  We’ll just leave that out for now,” she finished, placing the item aside from the box.

Delphine smiled and they began poking through the box again.  There was a length of soft rope (“yeah, that didn’t work out so well,” Cosima dismissed, making Delphine resolve to ask about the story behind it at some point,) a few small black rubber bits (“oh, those were the covers for some clamps. Turns out I only enjoy using those as roach clips,”) two bottles of lube, condoms, and two silicone dildos, one a wavy pink, the other the unlikely shape of a smiling dolphin, (“that I kept as a _joke_ ,” Cosima insisted, “I was seeing this girl in PETA…”)

Delphine finally pulled out a ball of leather and nylon webbing that turned out to be two harnesses, tangled together.  Cosima set about working them apart.

“The nylon one works well, is easier to wash and is less… leather-y than the leather, I guess.  But I kind of think the leather’s hot.” This reminded her of something.  “You know, I’m _totally_ taking you to the Folsom Street Fair someday.”

“Someday,” Delphine smirked.  She was weighing the more free-form dildo in her palm. 

“Why only two?” she asked.

“What?”

“Why only two, euhm, ‘dildos?’” Delphine clarified.  “You seem to like to sample so much else.  Or was the dolphin just enough?”  


Cosima rolled her eyes at the taunt, then narrowed them in thought.

“I dunno,” she admitted. “I had more.  But, I guess for both sanitary reasons and emotionally cleaning house I tend to throw away the ones I use with a specific person for a while after we break up.  The pink one is just my favourite,” she reached out, snatched the offending water-mammal shaped one from Delphine’s lap and chucked it in the direction of the bedroom door, “and this one, which is _a joke_ , is getting tossed now.”

Delphine smiled at the small pink patches that rose to her girlfriend’s cheeks, then watched as Cosima held up the finally-extracted leather harness up with a small “ta-dah!”  Delphine tilted her head, resting her chin on one hand.

“Soooo,” she started, “if that is what you have done, and we are in a relationship now, perhaps we should get some, just for us?”  She looked up at Cosima from under her lashes, and appreciated the slow grin that tugged at the smaller woman’s mouth, along with the slow rise of heat in her eyes.

“Oh, _yeah_ ,” Cosima answered, “I definitely think we should try that…”

She leaned over, across the open toy box, and pressed a slow, sensual kiss to her lover’s lips.  Delphine cupped Cosima’s cheek in one hand and kissed back, pressing closer, until a hum broke from Cosima’s throat and their tongues began to dance.  Cosima dropped the harness to her lap to reach out her hands to her lover, but there was a sudden _thunk_ as something heavy fell out of the wadded belting of the nylon version.  They both looked down.  A small, conical, glass object laid on the rug.  Delphine raised her eyebrows.

“I thought you said you only had those two left,” she noted, “and that looks rather small…”

Cosima flung both harnesses over the surprise item.

“That’s…” she bit her lip for a moment, flustered.  It was a gesture she had picked up from Delphine.  “That’s… not a dildo,” she finished, her eyes turning upwards to regard Delphine from under their lashes, as if expecting judgement.

Delphine recalled the size and shape of the “rather small dildo,” its bulbous thicker end and its flared base.

“Wait a minute,” she realized, “that doesn’t go in your…”

Cosima silenced her with another kiss.

“Nope,” she barely answered, and pushed the box aside, pulling Delphine into her arms, “and we’ll talk about that later,” she mumbled between kisses.

Delphine was part chuckling, part kissing back and part squirming in resistance.

“Oh, so now after acting the Big Expert you are going to try to distract me from…”

“Yep, ya caught me,” Cosima agreed shortly, tugging at her lower lip with a kiss and pulling her up towards the bed.  Delphine giggled as Cosima pushed her down and laid herself atop her, beginning to bite and suck at her neck. 

“But you will be telling me…” Delphine tried again, then caught her breath at a particularly strong nibble.  “No lovemarks above the collar,” she half-heartedly reminded the woman seducing her, with a flimsy slap to her shoulder.

“ _Later_ ,” Cosima insisted, working her way to the hollow of Delphine’s throat, with a self-satisfied smile as her girlfriend moaned.  “Don’t make me need to take that rope out.”

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> AN: I promise not all of these are going to be smutty without the actual sex. Sometimes it just seems a good place to close the curtain. And remember, I love comments and reviews, even if they aren’t glowing ones!


	3. Part III

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A continuation of the "smut" Cophine AU that seems to have turned into a character study involving lot of imagined conversations Cosima and Delphine might have about sex. Who knows? Your mileage may vary. Rated M.

Things were getting serious. Cosima could tell, because when she got home, Delphine was already there before her, she had a half-glass of wine and her glasses on, and was chewing on her lip as she stared at her laptop.

"What's up, Special Sauce?" Cosima teased, pulling her keys out of the lock and shutting the door.

Delphine looked up at her, and straightened, her expression thoughtful.

"What do you think about pornography?" she asked.

"Ohhh-kaaayyy," Cosima began, dropping her keys in the dish, stepping out of her shoes and pulling her coat off. She tossed it over the end table, knocking off several pieces of mail, a sheet of scrawled notes on chidren's toy regulations (Cosima was hatching something with Kira,) and a coaster to the floor in the process. Delphine saw this and let out an automatic sigh as Cosima approached her.

"I have many thoughts about pornography," Cosima answered slowly, folding her legs under her as she joined Delphine on the couch, her knees just touching her lover's thigh. "Why don't we reverse a bit and take a quick detour into context-land?"

"Oh, I'm sorry, my love." Delphine shook her head to clear it and leaned over to give her girlfriend a soft, welcome-home kiss. "I've been doing some research on our little… project, and I just feel there is so much I want to learn about you."

"Ah." Cosima rose and padded to the kitchen to pour herself a glass of wine as she continued the conversation through the pass-through. "There are a lot of things I want to learn about you, too, chou-chou, and…" she replied, making her way back to the couch and sitting again, "I totally agree to talk with you about them right now, on the condition that we order Thai food."

Delphine half-rolled her eyes and nodded.

"Whole snapper with sticky rice," she acquiesced.

"The usual, then. Tom Ka Gai and Gaeng Pah Muu for me." Cosima started tapping at her cell phone.

"Let me guess, you'll need to order the Thai iced tea to counteract the spiciness, and then you'll have to smoke a joint to be able to sleep after all that sugar and caffeine." They'd been together long enough that Delphine knew her well, in this area.

"But of course, just like you'll never finish that whole fish," Cosima grinned, finishing the order, "but honey, with this conversation and the day I've had today, I was gonna do a J, anyway."

Delphine reached over and stroked her partner's shoulder.

"Do you want to talk about your day?"

"Nah," Cosima answered, putting down the phone and turning towards her. "I'm all ready for porn, now. So, where did this question come from, and what specifically did you want to ask me about it?"

Delphine blew out through her lips, then explained.

"Well, I was thinking about trying new things with you, like we talked about. So, I've been doing some research. I am actually rather… appalled at myself that I've taken this long to really look into the subject. Instead, I let you do most of the teaching with me learning—"

"Hold the phone, there," Cosima waved the hand not holding a wineglass. "That's not how I see it. I mean, sure, you started off new to being with a woman, but between your enthusiasm and your powers of observation and reaction to my cues, I'd say you were pretty much a natural. And I'm not just saying that because you're damn fine," she clarified, a small grin playing at her lips.

Delphine smiled back at her, dimples emerging. She nodded her head.

"Bon. Well, with you, how could I not? Ever since that first kiss, you set me on fire, mon amour. I just always felt things… flowed really well."

"After that first time," Cosima pointed out. Delphine sighed.

"Yes, after that first time, when I was so nervous—"

"And guilty," Cosima added in.

"—and guilty," Delphine repeated, with small tinges of annoyance and resignation, "that I couldn't fully be present. Shall I apologize again?"

"No, baby, you know I'm just yankin' your chain. Three hundred-something times is probably enough," Cosima sassed, then spread her palm in a guiding gesture. "Go on."

"Fine. So, I just always felt our lovemaking was so fantastic, I just couldn't even think beyond that. I mean, I didn't think it could get any better for me, so I blindly thought so of you."

"Ugh, Delphine, it  _is_  fantastic, and the only thing that could get better would be us having fun exploring whatever you're comfortable with and you stopping chastising yourself for something I don't think you did wrong."

"Right, yes," Delphine nodded, appeasing her. "At any rate, I've just been looking into areas where my knowledge is slim, or perhaps I just never really thought about, and you had mentioned reading erotica, so, it got me thinking."

"About the porn or the erotica?" Cosima sipped her wine.

"Both. Either. I mean, there are different views about pornography, socio-politically speaking—"

"Can I just say how cute you are when you say 'pornography?'" Cosima interjected, raising the pitch of her voice and imitating Delphine's accent badly on the last word.

"Why do you always do that, with the speaking higher? My voice is not like that. I think you make me sound silly."

Cosima began to defend herself, but stopped.

"Oh, come… Yeah. Yes, I was teasing. Good point. I'm not sure why I do that. You're not silly, at least, not in general. Call me on it if I do it again."

Delphine leaned over and kissed her on the cheek.

"That's my darling. Thank you."

"So," Cosima paused to get back on track, "'sociopolitical.'" She turned and reached for the small box that held her smoking kit and began putting together a marijuana cigarette on the coffee table, as if the action occupying her hands helped her to focus. "As in what? As in some people being pro-porn as normal or empowering and others seeing it as degrading to women? Or maybe as in depictions of queer sexuality in pornography, or erotica, or the discourse thereon?" She was in dissertation mode, now.

"Mm, you pick." Delphine shifted her body to partially face her, pulling one leg up into a bent position on the couch, and tucking the toes of that foot under Cosima's thigh.

"Well, the way I see it is," Cosima opined, expertly rolling a small joint, "it depends on the porn. I mean, it's part of who we are, as humans, as sexual beings who can use technology to bring us images of things we, as apes, would just see naturally occurring around us, or hide behind some bushes to see, right?" She waved one hand. "I mean, totally different cognitive context, of course."

Delphine sipped her wine, not really sure where her stoner girlfriend was going with this, but enjoying observing her thought process.

"Okay, so," Cosima turned to look at her, face and hands becoming more animated in that way they did when she became excited by analysis. "Sex and, to a degree, voyeurism being natural, there's gonna be porn, and, it's going to illustrate some social construct of what we see is sexy. More often than not, that's going to reflect the normative, quantitatively speaking, mores of the major cultures, because: supply and demand. Not to mention that sociopolitical groups, like small groups of humans, often require a certain degree of members being like one another to belong. I mean, we're all about dichotomy and judging most of the time, right? Despite evolving, we have a hard time not putting things into yes/no boxes."

She paused to lick the joint with a practiced movement of fingers and tongue. Delphine smiled at the gesture.

"But," here Cosima placed the joint between her lips, lit it, and took the first toke, "over time and with greater tools for communication, some of the less-normative concepts of sex get disseminated, at the same time as we, as humans, keep exploring and, and… keep our big brains going when it comes to what may have started as an instinctual act, so that what we appreciate as sexy becomes more diverse."

Delphine was squinting now, trying to keep up, and not just because English was her second language. She moved her glasses to the top of her head and blew a stray strand of hair from in front of her face. Meanwhile, Cosima was squirming like she might stand up and pace at any moment.

"So, I guess," she hypothesized, the hand holding the joint making a sort of spiral as if to gather her thoughts into one point, and making a distracting smoke pattern as she did it, "pornography, like sexual activity, is very diverse, because we are diverse, because we combine primal urges with a consciousness that is way beyond what is necessary to reproduce, plus our complex social structures still can't keep up with the way the chemistry of our brains and bodies generate and handle emotions." She looked at Delphine as if that explained everything.

Delphine felt her own gears grinding.

"So," she pushed out, after a moment, "what you're saying is, pornography basically is… is only one way of depicting, and exploring, what is good and bad in elements of our… of our cultures, both widespread and less accepted, yes?"

"Oui," Cosima smiled, her tone a bit smug, and her French pronunciation purposefully a bit over the top.

"Mmhmm," Delphine nodded, taking another sip of her wine, then squinting one eye and waving a pointer finger in Cosima's direction. "That is all very insightful, but it still doesn't tell me what you, as an individual, thinks about it, both sort of… typical versions and non-normative."

Cosima took another hit of her joint, then exhaled a plume of smoke.

"Right," she admitted. "Well, then, as an individual, I would say I'm pretty open-minded. I certainly don't mind anyone doing what they want and recording it, as long as it's done in a way that's fully aware and consensual. However, in terms of reading, or watching or whatever, porn, my personal tastes lean towards things where the participants really seem to be enjoying it, and… and… I think, for me, a lot of the more prevalent kind of stuff, like average, basic, straight porn, seems to be poorly acted. Like, I can't buy that it's all that enjoyable? And, you know, I give props to sex workers and know desire can take what we think of as stereotypical forms… I mean, you know I've been with and dated men… sometimes I feel like the normative agenda is being pushed down our throats… both the actors and the watchers'… aaaaannnd that was a particularly interesting way to put it, I just came up with, there."

She laughed at herself, and Delphine joined in.

""Pushed down our throats.' Are you telling me you don't like watching blow jobs?" She teased.

Cosima shook her head. She extended her hand to offer the joint to her girlfriend, who shrugged and took a small drag, handing it almost immediately back, but holding the smoke well.

"No, it's that being rote bores me, and if it doesn't strike me as something both participants much want to be doing beyond a paycheck, I'm not into it." She put out the joint, her expression thoughtful. "Of course, that judgment is subjective, you know? I mean, I like to think of myself as fairly educated on sexual and gender constructs, and a pretty good judge of what's genuine, but it really just comes down to what I perceive and what buttons that pushes in me, I guess."

Delphine swirled the remnants of wine in her glass and then pointed it at her.

"That was patently unclear," she stated, as Cosima took her glass and rose to refill it. "But I suppose my question was very open-ended. That is why you asked me to be more specific, non?"

"Mhm," Cosima nodded, returning with the glass and bottle.

"Very well, then," the tall blonde agreed, and leaned forward to place a barely-there kiss on the shell of her lover's ear. Her voice was soft as she next spoke, the breath tickling the sensitive area of Cosima's skin. "Now that I know you like some erotica and pornography, perhaps you could share some of what you like with me?"

Cosima's eyes slid to the side toward Delphine's murmur, a pleasant chill spreading down the back of her neck.

"Share? As in, tell you about it, or share-share?"

"Whatever you want, mon amour," Delphine hummed, nuzzling her in a way that she knew would drive her girlfriend to distraction.

Cosima turned to face her, brushing their noses together, her lips millimeters from Delphine's.

"Has anyone ever told you that you're perfect?" she inquired.

"Ah, I believe you have, once or twice," Delphine noted, unable to fully conceal a smile.

Their lips came together, also once, twice, and Cosima dropped the joint into the ashtray to cup Delphine's jaw.

The electric doorbell bleated.

* * *

One delivery meal later (during which Delphine had to tell Cosima directly "do not kiss me with your spicy dragon breath,") they were curled up on the couch, soft music playing, and Cosima opening her laptop.

"So, if I'm in the mood and I have the time, which, as you know…"

They nodded at each other, acknowledging their busy schedules.

"'kay, so, I like written erotica and porn a lot, partly because it really lets me use my imagination, which means I can tailor it to what turns me on inside my head. As for videos, I tend to watch independent queer stuff, usually. I mean, it's on a case-by-case basis, but, you know, my personal preference for body mods is tats and piercings rather than fake tits."

Delphine hummed.

"Now there's something we don't usually see in the primate world."

'Well, why put on lipstick when your ass blows up all swollen and red when you're ready for nookie?" Cosima pointed out.

"I'm sorry I can't do that for you," Delphine mock-pouted, and they both chuckled.

"So, some of the stuff I like is what they call 'feminist' or 'ethical porn,' which basically means that women's consent and agency are prioritized by the filmmakers. Sometimes the directors are also the actors. If you do a little research you can find this stuff out, make sure they have fair pay policies, et cetera. Although, if it's indie porn and not a bigger company, chances are there's not a lot of money in it, so it's a labour of love, anyway. Or maybe a labour of kink."

"You know, I think it is sexy that you do research to make sure what you're watching is fair to women? I like that you can be scientific, be caring and look for stimulation all at the same time," Delphine winked.

"Well, you know me, always thinking," Cosima smirked back. "And I wouldn't say just women. I like people of all genders to be treated fairly. Not that sometimes I don't find something I like, say 'fuck it' and watch it first before I do some due diligence, or whatever."

"Well, we all get caught up in the moment now and then," Delphine acknowledged. "Like that time on the train…" She raised her eyebrows suggestively.

Cosima sucked in her breath.

"Ohhhh, God," she moaned, remembering. "When the doors opened and I got that cold blast of winter wind up my skirt… totally worth it, by the way. Plus, I think if we'd gone on ten seconds more, someone boarding the train would have bumped into us while I was coming."

"I actually remember looking at that rosy-cheeked German family and wondering what little Hansi and his parents would have thought if that happened," Delphine smiled, crinkling her nose.

"'Nein, nein! Ist der lesbianenenenen," Cosima giggled. "Zzzuch un public diz-grrrrace!"

"Ugh, I thought you said your grandmother spoke German," Delphine giggled back.

"Sure, but you know I can't pass up the chance to do an outrrrrrrageous accent," Cosima pointed out.

Delphine shook her head fondly and stroked the free baby hairs at Cosima's temple.

"And when the hotel access card wouldn't work…?"

"I was so mad! I had, like, the biggest case of blue ovaries."

They both laughed a bit more, then Cosima caught Delphine's eye with a look both sly and grateful.

"Thank Darwin you made up for it later."

"Mm, you too, as I recall," Delphine purred, and they both leaned in, sharing a kiss like a slow burn.

"You know," Cosima suggested, as they wound their arms around one another, "it's totally late, and we could finish this conversation later."

"Oui," Delphine agreed, sucking Cosima's lower lip into her mouth and running the tip of her tongue along it.

The talking portion of the evening was pretty much over.

* * *

It was a few days later before they talked about it again. It was a Sunday, and Delphine was taking a rare moment to read a non-work-related book for pleasure in the bed, when Cosima entered from where she'd been quietly poking at her laptop and sat beside her.

"Okay, you remember when we were talking about porn and erotica and stuff?"

Delphine blinked for a moment, then rested her book on her lap.

"Yes, mon amour."

"Well, I've got some stories and film clips I've downloaded, and I thought since we were all done with our errands and cleaning…"

Delphine smiled and slipped her bookmark into her book before placing it on the nightstand.

"By all means, then," she offered, patting the pillows beside her. Cosima clambered in all the way and leaned against the pillows beside her, laptop on her knees.

"You know, considering the last time we talked about it we didn't even get around to actually looking at it before you couldn't resist me, I'm hoping this will be something you'll enjoy." She began opening folders on her laptop, but she paused.

"You know, before we get into this, what do you think about erotica and porn? I didn't get your viewpoint, really. What's your experience?"

Delphine tilted her head, thinking.

"Well, as you say, I've always accepted that it's something inevitable in our society, particularly for men — not that women don't enjoy it, too. I know sensual imagery goes back as far as painting and sculpture, themselves. Also, I think, in France we are, most of us, a little more practical and realistic about these things. We find sex normal, rather than… salacious? Except for some of the very religious, of course."

"Right, yeah," Cosima acknowledged. She'd come to know more about French culture through Delphine.

"I mean, there are varying degrees of, of feminist opinion. But, as for me…" Delphine drummed her fingers, gathering her thoughts and translating them into English. "I have not been so interested in the hard porn, you know? I prefer, euhm, erotica, or something where the actors seem to have affection for one another. When it is just…" she hit her hands together several times, "pounding and grunting — and so many positions for no reason! — that makes me feel like I am watching an animal exhibition, like a zoo. We are primates, as you said, but I think we are more complex. But, at the same time, it feels too… intimate? For me, in a way. Like, I do not feel I need to be that close to a stranger's body parts."

"Especially in HD," Cosima interjected. "Nobody needs to see every ingrown hair, and stuff."

"Euh, that is not something I thought about. Although we do all have our blemishes, our scars."

Cosima thought for a second.

"So, does something erotic have to come with, like, a love story for you to dig it?"

"Well, I appreciate emotion of some kind, but I don't know that it needs an involved plot. I think, it's very easy to have sex that is impersonal, non? A more,  _mechanical_  union, it may be good for the moment, but having a pursuit, feelings, complications, makes it, for me, more sexy. There is a sort of a mental foreplay, it builds the anticipation. Certainly I may have a physiological reaction to just observing sex, but it is more like a, like a fast food hamburger than a real meal. And you know, I rarely like fast food."

"Well, you lost me on impersonal sex being easy. It's almost always turned into some kind of drama, for me."

"I bet that is because no one who is with you can help falling a little in love with you," Delphine grinned, cupping Cosima's chin and giving her a light, teasing kiss.

"Oh, yeah, that must be it." Cosima made a mock-smug face.

Delphine looked at the computer screen.

"Soooo…?"

"Oh, yeah, right," Cosima fiddled with the touchpad, and then paused for a moment. She turned to Delphine.

"Would you believe that now I'm feeling a little shy?"

Delphine giggled.

"Well, if you want to retain some mystery, that can be quite alluring," she offered, "but just as I trust you not to judge me, I will not judge you if our tastes are not the same." She kissed her girlfriend's ear. "And I am feeling a little shy, too… and a little nervous. But, also, a little excited."

"Yeah?" Cosima grinned. "Okay. So, I've got some fanfic bookmarked that you might like, although only for the shows you've seen so far. A lot of that is pretty romantic. I mean, if a story is written well, I can be more shmoopy and turned on in the space before the first kiss than I might with full-on sex in something else. However, some of the movie clips I've got are a little more hard core, with less plot. I think that I kind of like them when… well, when I just want to get right to the action. Sometimes it's not about being emotionally fulfilled or carried along by a plot. Sometimes I just want… a release, you know? And as much as I like thinking about you, when we can't be together, that can get kind of frustrating, I guess. So, given what you've said, I'm not sure you're going to like any of this."

"Okay, duly warned," Delphine accepted, "but I'm still curious and I still want to know what gets you wound up, when I'm not there."

Cosima swallowed and started a clip.

Delphine watched with her as two young women, one slender and brunette, and one more curvy and blonde, both with multiple tattoos and piercings, started kissing and touching each other.

"There's a tiny bit of set-up before this, but it's really not, you know, much of anything…" Cosima explained, as the two women began removing each other's clothing.

Delphine nodded and watched along. She was having some of that feeling of suddenly peeping at someone's private sex life that she hadn't been prepared to see. Cosima was watching her from the corner of her eye, gauging her reactions and colouring slightly in her chest and cheeks.

There was a lot of kissing and groping and sucking of fingers. Delphine began to lightly sweat. She wasn't sure how attractive she found either of the women with so little context, but they were alright, and did seem to be enjoying themselves. The blonde woman was flicking her tongue over the bar the other had piercing her nipple, and Delphine felt Cosima tense beside her. She glanced over and Cosima was chewing her lip. Delphine made a mental note.

"Didn't you mention you wanted to get a piercing there at one time?"

"Yeah," Cosima answered, not turning, "but I found out that it takes, like, a super long time to heal, and I've never wanted my nips to be out of commission for that long," she glanced over at Delphine and intertwined their fingers, giving her hand a little squeeze, "especially now that I'm in a steady relationship with such a hot number." Delphine smiled at her, and filed that factoid away for future conversation. She had to admit that not only did she guess that such an adornment would be attractive on Cosima, but the idea of how much it would obviously turn her lover on to have and display it made her want to discuss the possibility further.

The passion between the women in the film escalated, and soon they were naked and touching all over. Suddenly, the brunette stopped and told the other, "wait right here, don't move." The other woman panted, waiting, while being told from off camera to be patient. When the dark-haired woman returned, she was wearing a harness with a black dildo attached to it.

"Here's where it starts getting really good…" Cosima mumbled, and Delphine looked at her. She could see her lover's lips move silently around the words as the woman in the harness began talking dirty to the other, promising "I'm going to fuck the taste out of your mouth." Delphine's eyebrows rose, as she made another mental note, this time on just how much Cosima seemed to enjoy the rough, explicit wording. As the two women in the clip began grinding against each other, Cosima suddenly reached over and tapped the screen.

"There. Look at her  _face_ ," Cosima uttered, her voice low, and Delphine obliged. The woman getting fucked really did have a look of transport on her face, eyes closed, mouth gaping, skin flushed. The noises she was making weren't the usual rote lines Delphine had heard in some pornography. At the same time, the other woman looked honestly transfixed on her sexual partner's face, as well, determined to do what it took to get her off, even as she had to strain to go harder, faster.

Cosima's eyes were fixated on the screen. Delphine found herself glancing back and forth between her and the movie. Delphine realized she was… yes, she, herself, was feeling aroused, but she couldn't tell how much was from the porn versus watching her girlfriend's pupils dilating, tongue flicking over lips, hips squirming, accompanied by a nervous swallow. At the same time, she still had the feeling that maybe she shouldn't be watching the women on the screen. Some of the things she told Cosima about finding sex between strangers both impersonal and too intimate were definitely present in her mind, making her uncomfortable. Yet, every time one of them groaned, Delphine found herself sucking in her breath, hearing in her head an echo of what Cosima sounded like when she moaned in desire.

Cosima suddenly turned to her.

"You're watching me," she pointed out. Delphine felt herself flush. "Is this not okay," Cosima asked, "do you want me to turn it off?"

Delphine's lower lip found its home between her teeth in her usual nervous habit. She felt her blood rushing as her eyes met Cosima's, as though she were being sucked into her lover's desire.

"I…" she started, hitched, then breathed out, "I don't care…" Their gazes locked in understanding.

The laptop was pushed hastily aside as they grasped at each other, tugging on clothes, lips clashing, breath hot. Delphine could feel the energy of stimulation, of wanting, pouring off of Cosima in waves, and she was being swept along, her own arousal rising and flooding her senses. There was no slow build, no murmured endearments, just clutching at each other and moaning approvals. Delphine's teeth sunk into one of Cosima's nipples and the smaller woman threw back her head and cried out, her voice reverberating off the walls. Soon they were naked, entangled, and both had their fingers pumping into the other, pushing in a way that was almost competitive. Finally, Delphine felt an urge she couldn't suppress. She moved, pushing Cosima's hand out of her and aside, and captured her girlfriend's mouth in hers, thrusting her thigh between Cosima's legs and using it to push her fingers in harder with it. Cosima gasped, and threw her head back again, and Delphine watched as her amour held her breath, and finally came, shaking, with a long, ragged moan.

Things suddenly became rather quiet, just the sounds of their panting slowing down, some cheesy music playing from the laptop where it had been pushed, at some point, on its back at the foot of the bed. Cosima was holding Delphine tightly, the sweat between them making them slip against each other with each tiny movement. They took a few moments to recuperate.

"So," Cosima said, finally able to speak again, and looked into her lover's eyes, "you liked it?"

Delphine smoothed an errant dreadlock from Cosima's forehead.

"I liked  _you,_  my love," she answered, "I liked  _your_  pleasure."

Cosima was still coming down, and although a thoughtful look passed across her face, her eyelids were also drooping.

"I'll take that," she sleepily grinned.

Delphine leaned down and gave her a soft, slow kiss.

"I know you're tired, my love," she told her. "It's okay, get some rest."

She watched, her heart full, as Cosima turned and snuggled her back against her, wrapping herself in Delphine's arm. Her lover drifted into slumber quickly, spent.

Delphine chewed her lip some more, and thought. She knew she had enjoyed the build-up of arousal and the fervid sex, but she still wasn't sure if the actual pornography had been a strong catalyst for her. She still didn't feel fully comfortable with it, and she felt she should mull that over. How much of her uncomfortable reactions were related to the sexual shame society had instilled in her, as Cosima might say? And did it matter? It had led to a very intense interaction, so why question it? At the same time, if she didn't analyze how she felt, how could she know what she really liked and wanted, and what might end up feeling uncomfortable or like a turn-off over time?

She thought some more as she got up and brushed her teeth, washed her hands and face. Finishing, she leaned against the doorway and looked at her lover, sound asleep on the bed. The moonlight highlighted the curves of her one of her cheeks, shoulders and hips in a way that made Delphine's heart squeeze in her chest. Cosima was definitely down for the count. Delphine set the alarm, and slipped into the bed beside her, cuddling up as her big spoon once again.

* * *

Several days later, Cosima was met by a surprise when she came home.

Delphine hopped up from the couch, grabbed her hand and led her to the bedroom. Cosima shucked off her coat on the way and then joined her on the bed, raising her eyebrows as she saw Delphine had her laptop open, and her lower lip was caught almost non-stop in her teeth.

"I have been waiting for you," Delphine told her, as they leaned against the headboard and Delphine propped up the computer. "I did some more research, and I think I have found some kind of visual pornography that I like. Sooo… I think it's my turn…?"

Cosima looked at her partner. Delphine's eyes were bright, like a child wanting to show her friend a much-wanted Christmas gift. Cosima twitched her lips and nodded.

"Well then, carry on," she nodded, and Delphine pulled up a video.

On the screen, a handsome muscular man was walking across a room, shirtless. Cosima's eyebrows crept a bit higher.  _Oh, a guy. Okay, then…_  she thought.

Then the man opened the apartment door, and another hunky guy entered the room, smiling. They immediately began to kiss.

"Ohhhh," Cosima exclaimed, and slapped her pillow in emphasis. "You're one of  _those_  girls!"

Delphine turned to her, her expression nervous, uncertain. She had trusted in her love to honour her word and not judge her, so she wasn't sure what to make of her interjection. Cosima smiled.

"You like gay  _male_ porn," Cosima explained, giggling, and then held up her hand. "High five — I can work with that!"

Delphine looked puzzled, but limply slapped her girlfriend's waiting hand. "One of ' _those_ girls?'" she asked.

"Sure, that's not unusual," Cosima smiled. "Who do you think writes all that boy-on-boy fanfic?"

Delphine looked at her for a moment, before giggling herself.

"Well, I just thought… I mean, when it is two men, they're so… it doesn't feel so… vulnerable, for me, somehow? It's not something I expected. I just think it's… hot."

Cosima nodded in understanding and gave her cheek a small squeeze.

" _Totes,_  I get it. It also subverts the dominant paradigm of how males are 'supposed' to behave in our culture, which is, you know…"

"'Oddly romantic?'" Delphine finished for her. They shared smiles and a small kiss.

They snuggled up to watch and Delphine felt her cheeks flushing as her body responded to watching the two men engage in numerous sexual positions, while musing that that was the very thing that had seemed ridiculous to her in some of the heterosexual scenes she had seen in the past. The men certainly did seem to be into each other, too, she observed, and glanced over at Cosima, who started making little "rah-rah" first pump motions, egging the men in the film on. Delphine laughed and Cosima winked at her.

Delphine felt delighted that her love was so understanding and game. As Delphine discovered more about herself and her sexuality beyond her previous, more normative, experience, Cosima seemed totally supportive and willing to go along. How, in the past, could Delphine ever have predicted that she would end up in a relationship with a woman — an  _extraordinary_  woman, even putting clones and conspiracies aside — much less in bed with her watching two men having sex? Once again she thought of how confined her world had really been before, as she concentrated all her energies on the science, on her career. But it turned out that opening herself to this woman had both expanded her sexual horizons and opened her mind in ways that were beneficial to her work in the biology fields. Cosima approached so much of the world with both a childlike curiosity and a mature acceptance. She sparked the same in Delphine, whether they were talking about genetics or sex, apparently.

"I wonder if there's some kind of material you would find… you would not approve of, if I had brought it up," Delphine speculated, half to herself. Cosima chuckled.

"Could be…" she answered, "even I have my limits. Hey, wait! Don't tell me you have a crush on Felix, do you? I always wondered why you were so nervous around him."

"Cosima!" Delphine exclaimed, slapping her girlfriend's arm for about the thousandth time in their relationship. "You know it's because he didn't like me from the beginning."

"Mmmyeah, it's okay," Cosima teased, "I think everyone kind of has a crush on Felix. Although, wait," her eyes grew rounder, "damn, should I be glad you haven't met Tony, yet?"

Delphine was shaking her head, now.

"Are you going to be insufferable about this? Are you joking, or part serious? You know you're the only clone I'd ever be attracted to," she told her. Cosima snickered.

"Are you sure? Sometimes when you look at Allison…"

Delphine hit her again. They ended up wrestling a bit before giving up to have dinner. Delphine made sure to end up on top holding Cosima down just to take her down a peg. She kissed her lover on the nose and hopped off the bed and into the kitchen. She gave Cosima things to chop while they listened to the CBC.

"Now, after dinner," Cosima assured Delphine in her ear, holding her from behind as Delphine put the finishing touches on the salad, "we can get back to that movie. I definitely want to see what gets you all hot and bothered, Doctor Cormier."

"Mmm, that sounds fun. Although, you know, it's always  _you_ that turns me on, mon amour," Delphine smiled, leaning back to kiss Cosima's cheek. "Especially," she whispered, and Cosima leaned forward expectantly, "when you clean up after dinner without being asked."

Cosima made an  _ugh_  noise and rolled her eyes, and they both smirked.

"You know I enjoy being domestic with you, but can we be more that new-ish couple who jumps into bed for tonight? I promise to clean up in the morning."

Delphine pursed her lips in thought.

"I just want to get back to touching you," Cosima needled, giving her purposeful puppy-dog eyes, until Delphine rolled her eyes and sighed.

"I suppose I should not say that I find having a clean kitchen a turn-on," she mused, and Cosima chuckled into her shoulder. Delphine turned and kissed her.

"Of course, my love, if you promise." They gave each other a little squeeze. "Just don't forget: we have so much more experimenting to do."

And maybe that was it, Delphine thought, as she watched Cosima set the table. They were experimenting, keeping open minds, as a part of their "crazy science," but they didn't need to be so analytical as to spoil the mysterious physical and emotional flow that drew them together. They might be scientists looking to understand and improve on the natural world, but ultimately they knew that the chemistry that bound them, and the love they shared, was a fascinating yet satisfying mystery that could probably never be fully described or explained.

"What?" Cosima asked with a half-grin, looking up to find Delphine watching her.

"I was just thinking. With all we've been through, you are the most fun I've ever had," Delphine smiled back at her, then sidled up to her and wrapped her arms around her waist. Cosima returned the embrace.

"Also," Delphine smiled into her lover's ear, "I definitely think I have discovered that what I am is Cosima-sexual."

A soft puff of laughter blew across Delphine's cheek.

"High five," Cosima said again. "I can work with that."


	4. Part IV

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> They were good at this, losing themselves in each other. Their bodies had always been drawn together, and sex had always been good, but it had taken time to learn their individual topographies, where they were sensitive and how they responded to what kind of touch. More than that, it had taken time to trust, both in each other’s intentions, and that each time wasn’t quite possibly their last.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Wherein out heroines... oh, Hell. There's a lot of intellectual talking and then some detailed smut. Just read it.
> 
> So, I've finally posted an update. Whew! Thanks for your patience, and, as always, feedback is appreciated.

Delphine could barely believe it when she showed up at Cosima's place of work.  Her sweet scientist wasn't still in the lab. She wasn't off in the cafeteria, or wandering the hallways, or even on the roof sucking on her vapourizer. She was actually in her office, laptop packed, shoving the last of a pile of papers into her bag. All she had to do was put on her coat, and she'd actually be ready to go on time, for once.

“Hey, baby,” Cosima chirped, as Delphine slid through the partly-open door. Delphine could not help grinning at Cosima's perky tone.

"You seem excited," she teased, holding up Cosima's coat so she could easily slip her arms in.

Cosima pulled her coat together and started to button it, turning around to lean up and plant a kiss on Delphine's lips.

"Can you blame me," the shorter woman grinned back, letting out a soft hum as they kissed once again.  "I'm excited for our field trip."

Delphine chuckled and Cosima leaned down and picked up her bag, then turned back and held her hand out.

That little gesture was one thing Delphine loved about Cosima.  When they had first been getting to know one another, Delphine had been the one to grab her hand.   She didn't know if it was because she had less hang-ups about holding hands with a female friend than Americans seemed to, or because Cosima was already attracted to her and feeling bemused about it, but even though Cosima took to holding her hand, reaching with her own initiative to catch Delphine's fingers had been a bit rare, and only happened when Delphine had already grabbed hers earlier. Of course, there had been times when Cosima had stopped altogether, like after that first betrayal, when Delphine had to follow her to Toronto and prove she was on her side. Nowadays, though, Cosima offered her hand all the time and — not so much automatically grasping as Delphine did, but holding out her hand in a gentle offer.  Delphine loved the way this gesture was so Cosima: warm, inviting, asking but not insisting.  She intertwined her fingers with her lover's and allowed herself to be tugged gently out the door.

By the time they got to the door of the sex toy shop, Cosima was practically skipping. She grabbed the door handle, performed a tiny impromptu jig, and opened the door, standing to the side and gesturing toward it with a slight bow.

"M'lady," she said, trying to sound serious.  She didn't succeed.

"Mon dieu, you're practically spinning out of control, my love." Delphine shook her head fondly, with a little eye roll.  "Did you raid the espresso bar, again?"

"'Spinning?' You could almost say I'm _vibrating_ ," was the rejoinder, as Cosima's tongue poked from between her teeth. “I can't help it, I've got the _dildo fever_ ,” she sang.

"Ugh, Cosima," Delphine sneered in distaste.  "Must you use one of the least appealing word in the English language? And on the street?"

"What word is that, my embarrassed little puppy," Cosima asked, goading her. Delphine blew out a puff of air. Clearly, her girlfriend was in one of her puckish moods, and she knew they'd never get in out of the cold or stop bantering in this vein unless she gave in.

"Dil-do," she muttered, and Cosima cracked up, bending over with the force of her laughter.

" _Co-si-ma_ ," Delphine scoffed lowly, trying to keep her voice down.  Her girlfriend could be so ridiculous.

"I'm sorry," Cosima gasped, straightening up and easing into chuckles. "It's just the way you say it with your accent.  It's so cute. Hardly the worst word in the English language."

Delphine blew a tuft of stray curls out of her face and turned on her heel to enter the store with as much dignity as possible.  Cosima followed.

It was not the first time Delphine had been in a sex toy shop.  She had gone in one with friends out of curiosity years ago, and another one to fulfill a list of favours for a bachelorette party.  (That had been when she had seen the small, discreet vibrator she now kept in the bedroom closet.  She'd snuck it in with the rest of the gifts and later put it aside for herself.) She'd had one male lover who'd wanted to go into one with her, but his long chain of jokes about anal sex and scatological matters put her off, and she'd diverted them to a bar, mostly so she could get a drink to counter the headache she was getting at that point.

She found it interesting that most of the heterosexual men she had known tended to view erotic devices with humour, discomfort, or a combination thereof.  There seemed to be an unspoken male code — perhaps, actually, spoken, in some situations — that defined using toys as the purview of women, gay men, and the mockably "hard up" or "perverted." She knew straight men bought toys for masturbatory purposes just as other people did, but most of them didn't seem to admit it, at least to her.  She'd had one friend whose boyfriend seemed to be open to experimenting in different ways, but she'd heard of that through her friend, of course, not him, and her other female friends had seemed either embarrassed or childishly titillated by the stories.  Even her one bisexual friend, Yvette, seemed to avoid getting into discussions on these matters. Was she also shy about them, Delphine wondered, with the benefit of hindsight, or did she just not want to deal with her straight friends' attitudes?

Delphine, in the face of this, but more because she'd focused on her career in science for most of her life, hadn't thought much further on the subject, except when it was brought up to her by someone else.  Still, although she preferred to be a bit more _decorous_ than Cosima, it was interesting to her to find she wasn’t overly uncomfortable in the store.  It was clean, well lit, painted in soothing colours and well-organized.  Sharing it with Cosima made her feel ready to invest.

"Ooookaayy," Cosima started, rubbing her hands together. "Want to go to one section in particular, or just browse around?"

Delphine shrugged. She preferred to head right to the, _ugh,_ dildo section and accomplish their intended goal, but she wanted to appear casual, and she knew how excited Cosima was for this.  She stuffed her hands in her pockets and began wandering unhurriedly in the right direction, taking a glance at other shelves here and there, lips slightly pursed.

Cosima shrugged and began flitting from one display to another, poking at some things, checking price tags, and making a variety of facial expressions.

Delphine was staring, lost in thought, at the soft packing cocks, when there was a small noise beside her.  A door she hadn't noticed that was built into the wall swung open, and a young woman walked out, giving a small, distracted smile to Delphine as she closed the door behind her. She was striking, in the way some young women seemed to favour, with mussed, stylised hair in black and purple, an eyebrow ring, and a full sleeve tattoo on one arm under her torn band t-shirt. "Trick" was spelled out on her employee name tag, Delphine noticed as the girl passed by her, leather pants clinging.  Delphine wondered if that was meant to be a joke of some kind, or the name the woman actually went by.

She should have seen it coming. "Trick" paused a moment, saw Cosima looking at what appeared to be a wide, conical vibrating device, and made a beeline toward her.

"Hey, anything I can help you with," she asked Cosima, turning so that Delphine could see her big, flirty smile in profile. Delphine unconsciously shifted her weight to one foot and crossed her arms.

And there was Cosima, looking up with her wide, friendly smile, and answering

"Yeah, I was wondering, comparatively to other models, what this kind is good for. I mean," her lips pulled to the side and her voice dropped, "I guess you're supposed to _sit on it_."

The other woman chuckled and stepped closer.  _Oh, Cosima_ , Delphine thought. 

It wasn't like Delphine didn't get looked at.  She had been told she was beautiful many times, after she got over the hump of early puberty. She felt the gazes on her sometimes as she walked the streets or when they went out for a drink. It was almost always men, and some of them had no compunction about approaching her even when she and Cosima — or whomever she was with, actually — were clearly immersed in conversation.

The thing was, after a certain point in her life, it had just grown irritating to her. She knew she had special benefits afforded to her because she was thought classically pretty, but it just all seemed so phony when a suitor complimented her on her (dyed and carefully done) hair, looked into her large eyes (ringed with makeup, and really just a genetic inheritance from her grandfather,) or took in her figure (again, inherited, as well as being the product of taking ballet lessons as a child.) These things were a part of her, for certain, and she recognized and had sometimes taken the advantages that came from appearing appealing and professional to the world, but the truth was she'd much rather be admired for who she was, her intellect, her hard work, her kindness... and definitely, since Cosima came into her life, for her found ability to fiercely follow her heart and moral compass for love, even at great risk.  She was touched, sometimes a little shy or giddy, even, when Cosima complimented her attractiveness. She just found that sort of thing coming from most men and some women kind of creepy, in a way, so based on the happenstance of family tree and social artifice.

But it felt different when those admiring looks were turned toward Cosima.  Her girlfriend was beautiful, yes, but in a less traditional way. Cosima definitely had a style all her own, far different even from the other clones, but, more than that, Delphine felt she had a _presence_. Everything in her voice, her phrasing, her expressions, the way she moved, was, to Delphine, vibrant, unique, sexy. Cosima would probably protest if Delphine ever said it, but she felt as though she, herself, was mainly looked at as an object, whereas the way Cosima’s mind worked, the way she expressed it, her easygoing warmth and her confidence, all just seemed to emanate from her whole being like an aura.  Of course, the way Cosima acted with her, listened to her, made Delphine feel sexy, too. But she could not see in the mirror the sort of energy she felt coming from Cosima, drawing people in like a warm fire on a cold night.

Little Ms. Trick seemed to be ready to warm her hands at that fire, alright.

“…so it’s more of a wide-spread vibration,” she was telling Cosima.  “It’s powerful, but it isn’t super adaptable, no. I think I have something over here you might like if you want something a little but more, uh, _flexible_ …”

Delphine’s eyes narrowed. Seriously, how long would they have to be together before this sort of thing stopped making her feel stupidly jealous?  They’d had more than the run-of-the-mill challenges and problems, that was for sure. But she liked to think that drew them even closer than might happen in a relationship fostered under more standard circumstances.  She just couldn’t help it, though.  She had nearly lost Cosima too many times — and the irony was never lost on her that she had found the most wholly unique and special person in her life, the one who really _fit_ with her, amidst an unprecedentedly large group of genetic identicals.

“Wow, that _is_ flexible,” Cosima was now saying, grasping a bendable vibrator and curving it this way and that.  The shop employee was really in her personal space, now. Cosima turned to look at her.

“You know, my girlfriend might be interested in this.  Honey,” Cosima called, looking to Delphine and raising her eyebrows. She made a little come-hither motion with her hand.  “Come take a look at this.”

Delphine had to bite the side of her cheek to keep from grinning like a goofball when “Trick’s” face fell.

By the time they made it to the… _priapus_ section, Cosima had inspected a good number of items and rated them in order of preference for possible purchase.  Cosima, although finally gainfully employed, was still pretty good about not overspending, but apparently going to a sex shop made her ready to throw every credit card they had at the register.

_I should’ve said I wanted to go directly here_ , Delphine told herself, but, in truth, she was enjoying how much of a good time Cosima was having. I’m _having a good time_ , she realized, still feeling a little out-of-place, but segueing from actually being a curmudgeon to acting like one to tease, then feeling frissons of delight and speculative heat at the items they looked at and the things Cosima said.

“I kind of like the black and purple swirls,” she was now saying, hefting the molded silicone in one hand, “but I have to say, there’s something about flesh tones.”

_Black and purple_ , Delphine thought, inwardly feeling satisfied at the shop girl’s disappointment again.

“Mm,” Delphine shrugged. “I can see that, but what range of skin tones do you think?”

“Depends,” Cosima looked at her.  “Sometimes it’s kind of hot having the… illusion? That it could be an extension of your body.”

“No, uh, glittery blue, then,” Delphine quirked her lips.

“No glittery blue,” Cosima repeated, playing along.

“And no dolphins?” Delphine chuckled at her own joke.

“Ugh, I _knew_ it was coming, Cormier!  I can’t take you anywhere.”  Cosima made as if to bop her girlfriend on the head with the wobbly accessory.

“ _Me?_ Oh,” Delphine rolled her eyes, then reached to trace Cosima’s empty palm with her fingers.  “Honestly, I think the size and shape are good for me.  It’s interesting what you say, but the colour is not so important to me.” She reached toward a paler flesh-coloured example to check it out., but Cosima’s hand suddenly shot out and grabbed hers at the wrist, stopping her.  Delphine looked at her, surprised and with a question mark practically hovering over her head.

“No,” Cosima said in a tone that brooked no argument.  “No balls.”

Delphine looked back at the dildo and noticed the realistic scrotal sac at the base. She looked back at Cosima and they both burst into barely suppressed giggles.

They were finally waiting to ring out when Cosima gasped and scurried over to a small display.

“Hey, look at this,” she prompted, holding up what appeared to be a refrigerator magnet with a smiling, purple cartoon character on it.  The character was oddly shaped, somewhere between branching coral and a patchy bunch of grapes.

“Man, what I wouldn’t give to have a t-shirt of this,” Cosima commented, looking around to see if she had missed one somewhere.

“Euh, Cosima, who is it?”

“What,” Cosima looked down at the magnet.

“The cartoon character,” Delphine clarified.

Cosima blinked at her.

“Oh.  Not who, _what_ ,” she answered.  “It’s a Skene’s gland. A little crude, but… get it?”

Delphine’s forehead ruffled. They blinked at each other. The person in front of them at the register finished ringing out.

“Nevermind,” Cosima said. “Let’s check out our stuff.”

 

* * *

 

They were sipping their wine at the restaurant, their goodies stashed in an extra large bag Cosima had brought, when Cosima brought it up.

“So, uh, do you really not know what a Skene’s gland is?”

Delphine searched her memory. There was something familiar about the name, but she couldn’t place her finger on it.

“I… don’t remember,” she answered.

“Oh my God, what are they teaching you in medical school, Doctor?  The urethral sponge ring any bells?”

Delphine was starting to get annoyed.

“Yes, Cosima, I know what the urethral sponge is.  Wait… the Skene’s gland,” she snapped her fingers, “is a gland that is located on the anterior wall of the vagina, the one that they think is linked to…” she lowered her voice, “female ejaculation?”

Cosima clapped her hands once, softly.

“Bingo! So, it’s, like, a joke, and homage, really, to making your Skene’s gland happy… what?” Delphine was giving her a look she couldn’t quite read.

“Well, it’s just that… it’s just a theory, not a scientifically proven…” She trailed off.

Cosima blinked at her again for a moment.

“Oh,” she uttered, then tented her fingers under her chin.  “So… you’re saying, what?  The Skene’s gland’s role is in contention?  Or… female ejacuation…?”

Delphine cleared her throat.

“Well, there have been conflicting studies, non?  Recent data suggests there may not be any such thing as a g-spot, or that it may vary or be absent or present from body to body, and the same can be said for the, what they call the ‘female prostate.’  And female ejaculation, that’s not a proven fact.  Some argue in favour of it, while others contend that the bladder —”

“Okay, whoa, wait,” Cosima interrupted her.  “Considering our experience, _your own_ experience, you’re doubting its validity?”

Delphine’s eyebrows scrunched further together.

“Well, I certainly know there’s an area at the front of the pelvic wall that is stimulating, but…”

“ _’Stimulating?_ ’” Cosima gaped.  “How can you just…”  She lowered her voice as Delphine shot her a reproachful glance. “I mean, how can you question female ejaculation when _you’ve_ ejaculated?”

There was a moment of stunned silence.

“What,” Delphine whispered.

“Delphine —“ Cosima began. The waiter chose that moment to show up with their entrees.

They picked at their food for a while, both looking preoccupied and a bit concerned.

“The bluefish is quite good,” Delphine ventured.  “The balsamic reduction really cuts through the oiliness.”

Cosima was going through another ill-fated vegetarian phase.

“I like what they’ve done with the cauliflower steak, but the creamed spinach is a little heavy on the cream part.”  She held up her fork. “Want a bite?”

Delphine took the taste offered and nodded thoughtfully.  She took a sip of her wine.

“Maybe better with a dry white,” she speculated.

“Mm,” Cosima answered. They both fiddled quietly with their silverware for a moment.

“So, uh, so I’m guessing you don’t want to talk about this _now_ ,” Cosima began carefully, “but I have a feeling you’ve been… reading articles and research papers that aren’t…” She paused, restarted. “It’s just so frustrating that the medical establishment… I mean what you’ve been taught, to get a medical degree…”

Delphine gave her an annoyed look.

“Yes, I am a doctor, Cosima. But I’m an immunologist, not a gynecologist.  I’m sorry I haven’t had the pleasure of taking multiple courses on feminism and sexuality at Berkeley —”

“Two weeks on oral sex alone,” Cosima interjected.  “I’m just sayin’ —“

“Well, you’re right. I don’t want to talk about it right now.”

Her tone was progressing beyond irritated.  Cosima figured she had to ease things down a little before her girlfriend got full-on defensive.

“Okay, no problem,” Cosima assured her, raising her hands in a placating gesture, and then slipped one hand over one of Delphine’s.  “I’m really sorry if it sounds like I’m being snotty, baby.  I just… I know you were feeling as though maybe there was more you could do to make me feel good, and I want to talk about this later because I want us to explore ways to make _you_ feel good, too.”

Delphine’s expression softened, but she couldn’t help pointing something out.

“You know you can act a little too pedantic sometimes, non?”  Cosima smirked.

“I think you mean pedagogical, my brilliant darling.”

“I know what I meant, and so do you,” Delphine insisted, perhaps less jokingly than her dinner date. “I also know that if you don’t watch it, all conversations about having sex will become moot.” Now she smirked back.

“Touché,” Cosima surrendered, and switched topics to a recently published paper on horizontal gene transfer.  She was, surprisingly, able to restrain herself from using the term as a joking euphemism.

* * *

 

 

Back at home, Delphine came out of the bathroom to find Cosima had laid out their new toys on the bed.

“Pretty nice haul, huh,” the brunette observed, as Delphine approached behind her.  She picked up two toys and turned them end up, pretending to make them walk towards each other.  “Look, they’re like the mommy and the baby,  Or the father and the son, I guess.”  She made a funny voice. “Hey, kiddo, don’t forget to put on your lube before you go inside.”

Delphine literally facepalmed.  She couldn’t see her girlfriend wiggling her eyebrows in jest, but she could practically sense it.

Laughing at her own joke, Cosima turned and draped her arms over Delphine’s shoulders.  Delphine was trying to resist, but eventually the chuckles building in her chest and throat broke out.

“Oh, mon amour,” she sighed, putting her arms around Cosima’s waist.  “When was the exact point in our relationship you decided you wanted your own comedy special based on our sex life?”

“Hey, hey, now,” Cosima answered, linking her fingers behind her girlfriend’s neck.  “Not just our sex life.  We’re, like, super telegenic together.  Imagine the ratings.” She gave her love a squeeze. “You know I can be serious, now and then.  It’s just those looks you give me.  If you didn’t try to look appalled and then laugh, I would stop doing it.  _You_ are an enabler, my dear.”

“And you have the most ridiculous addiction. Although, I will say, you do continue to get a rise out of me.  Have I mentioned that I’ve never laughed with someone so much in my life?” She gave Cosima a squeeze back. “You can be a little brat, but you do make me happy.”

Cosima nuzzled Delphine’s nose with her own.

“You make me happy, too.  And _you’re_ my greatest addiction.”  They shared a kiss.

“Okay,” Cosima said, when they leaned back. She turned and swept the toys back in the bag, then sat and patted the bed beside her.  Delphine sat down.

“Now, let’s go back to our conversation from the restaurant, and I promise to be less of an asshole about it.”

“Okay,” Delphine allowed, waiting to see where Cosima would go with this.

“So, I think when you look at scientific literature, there’s a lot of conflicting information.  Part of it, I think, is because the medical field, and men in particular, lag so far behind in their study and knowledge of women’s anatomy and sexuality versus the longer history of studying men.”

“Yes,” Delphine nodded, accepting her point, and waiting for the next.

“Now, you know me,” Cosima cautioned, laying one hand on Delphine’s thigh and giving it a soft rub. “I’m the poster child for science, generally.  But we also get things wrong, like, a _lot_ , and sometimes, not only are studies by women scientists dismissed, but information like first-hand testimony is disregarded as too subjective, when, I think, in the case of a complex biological and psychological topic like sex, readings from electrodes and observations in labs just aren’t gonna do it, even if you don’t want to go the other way and go completely based on, like, surveys, or something like that.”

Delphine nodded again. She drew one foot up on the bed and leaned her elbow against her knee, just taking in her partner’s train of thought.

“Okay, so, the fact is that our bodies’ construction and responses are variable from person to person, as are our more… mental, emotional reactions, all the way down to brain chemistry.  I mean, hello, I’m talking as a clone, here, and I think we’ve all observed that how I react to stimuli and what turns me on are very different from Alison’s, or Sarah’s…”

“Hm.  That’s not what they told me when you were away for that conference,”  Delphine mused. For a moment, Cosima’s eyes widened, and then she laughed.

“Good one, Dr. Cormier. Are you using a version of ‘that’s not what your mom said last night’ on me?”

Delphine shrugged, a bit proud of herself, and they chuckled.  Cosima continued with a bit lighter tone after that.

“So, here’s my subjective testimonial: female ejaculation is possible.  Maybe not with everyone, and probably not all the time or in the same way, but I’ve observed it, numerous times, and I’ve done it, too.”

Delphine cocked her head.

“Really? So, this has been with… other girlfriends?  Or boyfriends?” Once again she was reminded of how strangely their relationship had started, and how it seemed that had affected its subsequent development.  Having been through so many life-and-death scenarios, they, in ways, knew and loved each other more deeply and intimately than other couples might have in the same amount of time together.  However, it also seemed to mean that sometimes they skimmed over talking about some things. Did they subconsciously feel so bonded that details seemed unnecessary?  Or were there parts of them that were still wary of the damage that could be done when new knowledge about each other’s past was revealed?

“Well, yeaaahh…” Cosima cocked her head and pulled her lips to the side.  “But it’s also happened with you, just not as… dramatically. I mean, I’ve totally ejaculated, but, like, for me, personally, for it to be a lot, like a really _noticeable_ lot, I need a vibrator.”

Delphine pursed her lips in thought.  Cosima’s collection of vibrators was making more sense.

“So… and you say I’ve done it, too?  Because I think I would remember that.”

“Yeah, you’ve, like… like, the slow waterfall gush.”  Cosima made a movement with her fingers like liquid trickling down a surface, and Delphine felt her cheeks pinking.  “I mean, you know when you have a really killer orgasm, and afterwards, I’m all wet, and the sheets are wet?”

Delphine was confused.

“But that’s just… natural lubrication from vasocongestion, from… increased arousal, pushed out due to the muscular contractions of orgasm and the friction of intercourse.” Her look became doubtful. “… isn’t it?”

“Ah, well, no, I see where you might think that,” Cosima nodded, “and that is one theory that’s been put forth in the past.  She adjusted her glasses, obviously running through something in her head. “Do you think, I mean, from the information you’ve gotten, do you think that female ejaculation has to, like… squirt?”

Delphine blinked.

“Oh, euh, well… I suppose I always did.  And there was a lot of that in some of the porn I saw…”

“Ohhh, okay, yeah,” Cosima nodded.  “It’s become, like, a thing, now.  I mean, you know, it’s supposed to prove the woman is coming, right?  So sometimes they hire someone who really squirts a lot, more than other people, but sometimes it’s faked, using either a douche or urine.”

“Yes, I expected it could be faked, which was one reason I was doubtful,” Delphine explained. “So, yes, I see now, I’ve been seeing female ejaculation as analogous to males’, with it being ejected more forcefully… although, of course, there are natural variations of amount and pressure in males’, too.  But… the studies seem to conflict so much.  So what you’re saying is, the conditions of the studies are questionable or insufficient, and the depiction in erotica is erroneous or exaggerated? But you’re going on… personal observation and testimonial, then.”

“Yeah, talking with other women and what I’ve seen in person.  But again, I think the controversy stems from cultural mores and who’s doing the research.  I mean, FE is documented going back to around the 1600s.  It’s just that then somebody always comes out and refutes or dismisses it.”

Delphine thought a moment.

“So… so what of the analogy of the ‘female prostate?’”

“Oh, well, we’re back to the Skene’s, or, more accurately, the paraurethral glands, then. Because — evo-devo moment! — embryos take some time with the development of internal reproductive structures from epithelial cells, right?  And sex differentiation and the development of external sexual organs takes awhile, so just as the complete clitoral structure is much like the penis, or, I guess, the penis is like the clitoris, to be exact, the paraurethral glands are homologous to the male prostate.”

Delphine chewed her lip.

“I must be honest, I have heard or read about these things in passing before, but I didn’t really concentrate on them.  I was more wrapped up in my area of study.  My understanding was that once the actual area of the full clitoral tissues was established, there was debate as to whether what was deemed ‘vaginal orgasm’ was caused by stimulation of the so-called g-spot at the urethral sponge, or if all orgasms were essentially products of varying kinds of clitoral stimulation.”

“Well, yeah, that’s still a thing,” Cosima acknowledged.  “I mean, the most reliable way to a noticeable orgasm is via the clitoris, outside or in. But that doesn’t mean the production of fluid from the paraurethral glands isn’t involved, too. The structures just vary a lot from woman to woman.  Some women may not have them at all.  Also, some researchers classify the more viscous fluid from the Skene’s gland as the only real ejaculate, because it can contain prostaglandin, but there’s so much variation in the amount and make up of the fluids that are generated with sexual stimulation, so others classify a wider range of emissions.  As usual, it always comes down to the research on women being so behind that on men.  I think it’s just been centuries of ‘ack – internal genital structures!  And they bleed, and push out babies!  Women’s parts are some deep, scary, forbidden mystery!’  For some of us, though, that kind of mystery is exactly the kind of thing we want to thoroughly explore.”  She grinned.

The corners of Delphine’s mouth twitched.

“Why am I seeing you in a pith helmet and safari clothing, setting out explore the little-known land of women’s genitalia?”

“Because you’re awesome, and you’re starting to think like me,” Cosima teased.  “Also, I think it would be more like one of those helmets with a light for miners and cave explorers.  I’m an _excellent_ spelunker.”

They were both chuckling, again, now, and Cosima leaned forward to put a hand on Delphine’s knee and and give her a soft kiss.

“So, want to go exploring with me?”

Delphine’s chuckles faded, and her smile became a flirtatious grin.  She brushed her lips against her lover’s.

“I would be happy to have you as my guide.  Will we be using our new… exploring equipment?”

“Mmm, that depends,” Cosima replied, so close her breath tickled Delphine’s lips.  She leaned forward, sliding her other hand across Delphine’s waist. “We’ll have to see what makes you shudder.”

Delphine felt a delicious pulse in her groin at Cosima’s words.  They began to kiss more steadily, now, Cosima rising up on her knees and pushing slowly forward until they were breast-to-breast, and then further, so that Delphine reclined back on the bed, with Cosima on top of her. They sunk into the familiar yet thrilling feeling of pressing their full bodies together, exploring each other’s mouths with tongues and sliding their hands across planes and curves of flesh. Delphine hummed approvingly as Cosima drew up on her knees to kneel over her and began undoing the buttons on her shirt, her knuckles tracing down between Delphine’s breasts and squeezing her hips when the last button was undone. Cosima moved her hands her hands back up to slide Delphine’s shirt off her shoulders.  She inched her mouth away from their kisses so she could speak, sotto voce.

“Now, I may be asking some questions and giving you suggestions, as we go,” she said, as Delphine leaned upward and to place a kiss just below her ear, and raised her arms obligingly as her girlfriend pulled her sweater up and off.

“Mm-hm, more than usual?” Delphine murmured the inquiry into her ear, the caress of her breath giving Cosima a chill that raised goosebumps down her neck.

“Perhaps. It depends,” she answered, as they both reached around and unclasped each other’s bras at the same time. “I may even ask you to do some things that might seem a little odd, but trust me, it’s all in the name of science.”

Delphine moaned lightly in assent as they slipped their bras off and pressed skin to skin. Their kisses grew deeper as they stroked each other’s bodies slowly, helping one another remove skirts, stockings and panties.  Cosima’s thigh slipped between Delphine’s, both rolling their pelvises so that Cosima’s leg began pressing in a slow rhythm against Delphine’s sex.

Their breaths started coming harder, Delphine’s hands sliding up to cup Cosima’s breasts, thumbs stroking at her nipples.  Cosima let out a small huff of pleasure and began working her mouth down Delphine’s neck.

They were good at this, losing themselves in each other.  Their bodies had always been drawn together, and sex had always been good, but it had taken time to learn their individual topographies, where they were sensitive and how they responded to what kind of touch.  More than that, it had taken time to trust, both in each other’s intentions, and that each time wasn’t quite possibly their last.

Delphine let Cosima take the lead, too distracted by sensations to wonder much what different techniques her highly skilled girlfriend might have in store.  Cosima took her time, lavishing kisses, laps, flicks of the tongue, suction and nips from her love’s neck down to her collarbone, chest, and breasts, lingering there until Delphine was moaning loudly and squirming, and then slowly trailing further down, her tongue laving sensitive ribs, mouth sucking the flesh at the division between belly and pelvis up between gently squeezing teeth.  Her hands moved down, as well, stroking, coaxing, tracing the tender crease from hips to inner thighs.

Delphine was gasping, now, fingers weaving into Cosima’s dreadlocks.  The moment where her amour’s breath hovered over her hot, wet cunt seeming like an eternity of delightful expectation.  When the woman with her head between her legs parted her labia with her fingers and started running her tongue in slow, wide strokes up the length of her slit, adding little twists when she reached her clit, one of Delphine’s hands rose of its own accord to curl into her own hair, tugging, and let out a breath she hadn’t known she’d been holding with a throaty growl.

Her body resonated as Cosima worked her: now with a low vibration deep inside her cunt, now with an overwhelming judder on her clit.  She could feel her interior muscles beginning to clench and gape, to border on an ache, and just before she was able to gather her control enough to ask for more, Cosima gave it to her, sliding two slick fingers into her, and keeping up a languid rhythm of deep strokes.  Delphine found herself moaning with every inward thrust, sliding her knees up to plant the soles of her feet on the bed, the better to press her hips upward to meet Cosima’s fingers.

Cosima hummed and took a final lick up to Delphine’s clit, sucking at it and disengaging with a wet pop. She looked up at her lover, reveling in her moans and writhing, and used her keen skills of observation — a hallmark of any good scientist — to note every detail of how the woman beneath her responded to different types of stimulation.  She felt the pull of Delphine’s body to her hand increasing like a rising storm tide, the movement in her hips and abdomen becoming more focused, saw the roseate tinge of the sex flush on her chest deepening under her fair skin, heard the low moans and deep breaths that were thrumming through her sternum and throat via her open mouth, the little mew of disappointment that the tongue bathing her sex was gone, and then witnessed the fluttering of her eyelids before they opened, her eyes, wide with desire, meeting her paramour’s gaze as Cosima slipped in a third finger.

“You like that,” she asked, knowing the answer, but wanting to hear Delphine say it, and wanting to increase her lover’s desire with her words.

“Ohh.. y-yes. Yes, mon amour… _oh_.”  Her eyes fluttered closed again in a rush of sensation as Cosima shifted the position of her fingers, stretching the rear wall of her pussy with her lowest knuckles and thrusting at an upward angle so Delphine felt as though the tips of her lover’s fingers might be visibly tenting her lower abdomen.  Her hips arched up, the hand on Cosima’s head clutching, but Cosima didn’t bring back her mouth.

“Uh-uh, not yet,” Cosima said. The brunette shifted herself upward, tilted over her girlfriend’s lower stomach and pelvis, her arm at an angle to push in an ever deeper, steady, slow rhythm.  She could read the pleasure on Delphine’s face mixed with the disappointment at the loss of attention to her clit, and then the former overwhelming the latter as her inner walls began to pulsate in reaction.  Cosima knew what she was going for, and she kept sliding in and out, not increasing her pace, until the telltale signs of noises and body movements, breaths and flutters within indicated the beginning of a rolling, gut-deep orgasm.  She gentled her strokes even as Delphine’s hands clutched at her back, both frustrated at the easing off and too overwhelmed by the wash of sensations accompanying her release to protest.  Delphine let out an extended, low moan as her body sank back onto the mattress, the pulsations settling into a slightly aching afterglow of relaxation.  It was not an exploding fireworks sort of orgasm, but the part of her that longed to be deeply fucked was satisfied, maybe even a little bruised.

But then, Cosima, still watching her intently, pulled out one finger and started moving the other two again. She grinned as the Frenchwoman’s eyes popped open again, revealing surprise, uncertainty about being ready, yet, for more, and then the overriding pleasure of her body registering the new kind of stimulation.  Cosima kept her fingers shallower, now, curling them upward as if beckoning and increasing the pace to press and vibrate against the swollen front wall inside. She dipped her head back down and began to flick at Delphine’s clit with her tongue, appreciating the jerk of creamy, pale hips in response.  Her other hand moved down to stroke the back of one of Delphine’s thighs, and then to press it until the gasping woman beneath her understood her intention and helped to draw the leg up and against her breast, resting her foot on her partner’s shoulder.

Delphine felt her body revive, then start to surge.  The quick, curling motion of Cosima’s fingers sending a different sort of jolt and desire through her, the need to feel the brighter, detonative high that came from direct stimulation on the bundle of nerves in her outer clitoris. Her hips bucked, hands now clawing at the sheets, as Cosima picked up the pace of her tongue to create and almost vibrator-like stimulation.  Her moans were turning into groans, to exclamations, her voice rising in both volume and pitch. There was a heat building on the surface of her cunt, now, and her mind flashed to times Cosima had used a technique like this before, causing Delphine to flare like a fuse lighting, to sparkle. Her breath was catching in her throat, now.  She was either too overwhelmed to remember to breathe, or her body was starving itself of oxygen, shutting her basic functions down in anticipation, pushing for a faster release.

She was completely confused when Cosima’s mouth left her, the thumb of the hand moving inside her taking its place.  She was disoriented, caught up, as Cosima’s voice reached her.

“What are you feeling,” her lover asked her, and Delphine could do nothing but whine in return, finally eking out a straining “please…”

“Tell me,” Cosima insisted, and bit one of her nipples firmly, not to damage, but to sharpen Delphine’s perceptions, and satiate her own need to have part of her in her mouth.

“Ah!” Delphine was gasping. Cosima reached over and pushed her lover’s other thigh upward, so both knees were up at her shoulders, her sex fully exposed and spread.

“Ah… so _good_ ,” Delphine forced out.  “You’re… _mon dieu,”_ she exclaimed, as Cosima’s fingers shifted to an even shallower position, pushing upward and more forcefully at her urethral sponge. “Oh, it’s… it’s almost too much. I’m burning — I’m burning for you…”

Cosima rumbled deep in her throat, and panted out a command.

“ _Good_ … Delphine, I want you to _push_.”

“Quoi?” Delphine was feeling a sympathetic vibration building throughout her entire pelvis, now.  There was a tingling at the base of her spine, as well. But as a pressure built inside her, nerves sending messages she usually got from her bladder, she began to panic, tried to still.

“Baby, listen,” Cosima insisted.  “I want you to push, bear down with your Kegel muscles against me.  It may feel as if you have to go to the bathroom, but that’s okay. Just do it.  Just trust me.”

With that, Cosima pressed the fingers of her other hand against Delphine’s clit and began rapidly rubbing, building the heat and vibration to an almost intolerable pitch.

And Delphine pushed. She pushed and felt Cosima’s fingers slipping out of her with the force, fingers that continued to curl and tease just at the entrance of her pussy.  Delphine felt them both straining together to build the sensations to an overwhelming crescendo.

And she came undone.

Every bit of her energy, her life force, seemed to flow, streaming, from her extremities to her center and out though her sex.  It was an explosion of feeling, and somewhere in the midst of it she heard a sound under the keen of her own, trembling cry, a noise like a stream of water shooting at pressure, and then felt it coming out of her, warm, pulsating, spraying out and over her lover’s chest and arms, and a little bit up onto her face. Cosima was grinning, almost laughing as her fingers at Delphine’s entrance pulled entirely out, barely touching, now, the other hand still working her clit.

Delphine’s mind flew away for a moment.  She knew she was coming, and she felt the wetness splashing onto her thighs and down the underside of her ass to the bed, but she forgot to be worried or embarrassed, and just accepted it as feeling, in a suspended, floating moment, became everything.

And then she collapsed. And realized she was breathing again. And Cosima was laughing. Not in teasing, but in delight.

“Yes!” Cosima exclaimed, and crawled up to lay atop her girlfriend, kissing her neck. “Oh, my God, baby, that was _so_ _hot.”_

Delphine still couldn’t respond, but she wrapped her quivering arms around her lover and breathed in the scent of her, now mixed with the smell of sex, of Delphine’s own juices.

Cosima kissed down her jaw, and then lightly kissed her lips.

“How are you feeling?”

“Mmp,” Delphine managed eloquently.  She swallowed, and Cosima raised a finger.

“Hold that thought.”

Delphine watched in a daze as her girlfriend bounced up and shuffled out of the room. Delphine was finally getting her breathing slowed to almost normal when the animated brunette came back in with a pitcher of water and two glasses, plus two clean towels draped over her shoulder.

“Okay,” she urged, filling one glass with water and piling up some pillows for Delphine to lean up on. She actually helped the blonde, whose limbs felt like Jell-O, sit up and take a drink of water. “Well, now the tables have turned,” she smirked wryly, and Delphine found the strength to lightly swat her arm.

“Don’t say that, it’s not funny,” she protested, after swallowing some of the cool liquid.

“Oh, c’mon, you took care of me for ages.  Let me gloat a little,” Cosima teased, taking a towel and bending down to gently dry off Delphine’s thighs. 

The Frenchwoman leaned back against the pillows and drank the full glass of water, then let out a long “whooo…” of a sigh.

“Yeah, so?” Cosima shifted up beside her, sipping at her own glass.

Delphine’s cheeks pinked in slight embarrassment, but then she assured herself that there was nothing to be embarrassed about.  She had experienced exactly what her lover and best friend wanted her to. Cosima had proven her theory.

“Mmm, that was… incredible,” Delphine said, and reached up to stroke Cosima’s cheek.  She let out a small chuckle.  “And very, very messy.  Cosima, what are we going to do about this bed?”

Cosima giggled.

“Don’t worry, it was time to change the sheets and duvet, anyway.  Besides, it’s worth it.”  They shared a kiss.

“Okay,” Delphine nodded, “I think I have enough strength to help you.”

“Don’t worry about it, sweet stuff.  You just wash up and get ready to sleep.  I’ll take care of that.”

“Mmph,” Delphine grunted in response, mustering the energy to wobble to the bathroom door.

“Unless…” Cosima drawled, and Delphine looked at her.

“Unless what?”

“Unless you want to get a sample of this liquid for lab analysis?  I mean, I wouldn’t want you to think you just _urinated_ all over the bed.” 

Delphine shook her head at her girlfriend’s self-satisfied tone and leaned against the doorjamb.

“You know what,” she replied, “the way I’m feeling right now, I don’t even care.  You want me to tell you you were right, mon amour? You win.”

“Ooh, Doctor Cormier, you know it gets me all hot and bothered when you say _that._ ” Cosima’s tongue poked from between her widely grinning teeth.

Delphine rolled her eyes tiredly and turned back to enter the bathroom.  Just before she closed the door she heard:

“And you’d better get some good rest and recuperate, because next time it’s _my_ turn!”


	5. Part V

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> And Lo, I said there would be smut. And so there was.

_Damn, have the last few days been a hectic pain in the butt,_ Cosima Niehaus thought, finally getting the chance to stretch and gather her things to leave the office.  Some last-minute grant possibility had been found for one of the studies she was supervising, and she’d had to work overtime to help her team pull together reports, statistics and proposals to complete the application.  Then she'd had to put her best game face on and charm the potential grantors, giving them a tour that was equal parts science, flattering banter and solicitation.  

But the application process was done now, and things were looking good, so she felt like she just might be able to spend the rest of the evening relaxing and enjoying her patient girlfriend’s company, rather than being cranky and exhausted, venting about the irritating aspects of her task and the people she had to impress before passing out for a short night’s sleep.  She grabbed her phone and exhaled, sending a text to Delphine. 

_Finally done.  Want to go out to dinner?_

 She started packing up her bags, but was interrupted by her phone vibrating.  That was quick, she thought, and read the response. 

  _No.  Come home._

 “Huhn,” she said aloud.  “Abrupt, much?”

 When she finally got home she kicked off her shoes and shucked her coat as usual.  The living room was dim, but there was a light on in the kitchen and she could see a nearly empty wine glass on the counter, so she knew Delphine was there.

“Hello? Laconia McTerse-y-texts?  I’m home,” she announced.

There was a pause, and the Delphine stepped out of the bedroom.  It took a moment for Cosima to register that Delphine was definitely not adhering to her usual, casual evening relaxation routine.  Instead, she had on one of her fine, French silk robes, her hair and makeup were done impeccably, with crimson lips and smouldering eyes, and she was giving Cosima a very serious look, indeed.

“Oh,” Cosima reacted, taking this in.  “Why, Doctor Cormier…”

Delphine walked forward and took her hand, then turned to tug her toward the bedroom.

“Come,” she said, her tone brooking no dissention.  “I have a surprise for you.”

Cosima’s tongue curled to begin to craft one of her usual, cheeky rejoinders, but the words died on her lips as she entered the bedroom and saw it lit with multiple candles.  She allowed Delphine to lead her toward the bed, where two simple white boxes rested.  Delphine spread her hand toward them.

“Pick one,” she said.

Cosima bit the inside of her cheek for a moment.  She was a bit nonplussed by Delphine’s commanding demeanour, a little unsure about what she was to think of this mysterious request and how to respond, and, underneath it all, curious and excited.

“Ohhh-kaayyy…” she finally said, and pointed.  “That one.”

 Delphine nodded, picked up the box and handed it to her.  She stepped closer, close enough that Cosima could feel her body heat and the tickle of her breath on skin as she spoke in a low, matter-of-fact tone.

“Take it into the bathroom, open it, and put what’s inside it on — nothing else.”

“Uhh… yes, ma’am,” Cosima answered, only half-joking.  She turned around and headed into the water closet.  Delphine closed the door behind her, which prompted her to turn back, eyebrow raised in surprise.  They had seen each other changing clothes for a long time, now.  This must mean something special.

Cosima placed the box on the sink and looked at it.

“Okay, you… let’s see what ya got for me,” she said aloud.  She opened the box and, after pushing aside some tissue paper, found the leather harness and one of their recently purchased dildos.

“Oh.  _Jackpot,_ ” she whispered, a grin spreading across her face.

She undressed quickly, but took a little time to have a quick wash-up and tooth-brushing.  Smile still splitting her face, she strapped on the leather harness, tightening it firmly, and inserted the silicone cock.  She immediately felt a little raunchy, in a good way.  She briefly wished they had a full-length mirror in the bathroom, because she had a strong urge to look at herself and say “Bam!” while giving a little thrust of the hips.  She figured that might break the mood a little if she did it in the other room, however, so she just snickered to herself.

But then she paused.  _Harness,_ she thought.  _Dildo.  Delphine. **Bossy** Delphine. _

She felt a frisson shoot from her groin down to her toes.  She held the silicone implement in her hand and thought about what might be to come, the blush of rushing blood infusing her skin and spreading.  She wondered for a second what might have been in the other box.  _Schrödinger’s sex toy?_   She chuckled at herself.  With a stressful day, excitement about the situation and no calming weed, her mind was jumping.  She took a deep breath, closed her eyes, and gave the base of the cock a squeeze, running her other hand up her stomach to her chest.  She skimmed it lightly over her breasts, cupping, and then squeezed the nipples on by one.

She was going to fuck Delphine until she screamed.

She slid her hand back down her body and grabbed the doorknob.  Opening the door and stepping out, she almost immediately saw Delphine.

The gorgeous blonde was sitting in the armchair, leaning toward one side, one leg spread and draped over an armrest.  That was not all.  She was clad in a black corset, accented with lace, the bust laced and tightened so her breasts were pushed upward, creamy cleavage straining.  She’d gone all the way with black garters, sheer black stockings and her highest black heels.  She sat there, a picture of both elegance and louche daring, slightly slouching, one hand disappearing into the top opening of her matching black lace underwear.  The shape of her fingers under the material was sliding up and down slowly, obviously stroking herself between her labia and against her clit.

 _Oh, shit_.

There wasn’t anything else in Cosima’s mind, now.  Even words took flight.

“You took awhile,” Delphine told her, her voice low and aggressive.  “Did you expect me to wait forever?”

Cosima swallowed, and a slow, suggestive grin arched across her face.

Before she could say anything, Delphine was rising.  She walked unhurriedly, but with obvious intent, toward her lover, not even bothering to remove her gliding fingers from her own panties, stopping only when she was close enough for them to feel one another’s body heat again.

“Delphine…” Cosima let out like a purr.

“Shh,” Delphine hushed her, raising her free hand and firmly grabbing Cosima’s jaw.  She gave a tug, pulling the shorter woman — now even more so while barefoot — toward her so she had to strain her calves to rise up on her toes as Delphine bent to meet her.  The blonde claimed her mouth with her own.

The kiss was slow, strong and thorough.  Delphine explored the full interior of Cosima’s mouth with her tongue, while Cosima moaned and slid her tongue against hers in return.  The Frenchwoman pulled back slightly and laid an open-mouth kiss with her lips on the clone’s, once, twice, breathing her breath and sucking slightly, until she sank her teeth into Cosima’s bottom lip firmly, just enough to hurt a bit, and tugged.  Cosima shivered and nearly fell forward onto her.

Delphine pulled back her mouth again, hand still controlling Cosima’s jaw.  She said nothing, but her eyes were sharp, penetrating.  Cosima could hear her own breaths coming in shaky gasps as she returned her gaze.  It was patently clear: Delphine was taking control, and she was not up for banter.

Her multi-hued eyes dark in the candlelight, with pupils wide and probing, Delphine smoothly pulled her fingers out of her underwear.  She raised her hand, and pressed her glistening digits to Cosima’s lips, until Cosima opened her mouth, groaning at the smell of Delphine’s sex rising from her skin, and drew them in.  Cosima sucked and licked hungrily, letting the flavor sink in, Delphine watching her, lips slightly parted, as she did. 

Cosima was almost getting lost in these sensations until Delphine’s other hand left her jaw and stroked a trail down her neck, across her collarbone and to her breast.  Strong, elegant fingers caressed puckered flesh, and then closed against the thumb to give her nipple a light pinch that gradually built in pressure.  A sound rumbled in Cosima’s throat that was part pained exclamation and part delight.  Her eyes had snapped shut, but when she reopened them she saw Delphine watching her with a single-minded fascination.  There was no biting of her lip in that distracted way of hers, just a direct, unmistakably erotic focus.

Delphine eased her fingers from Cosima’s lips and replaced them with her mouth, kissing her in a way that made the shorter woman’s knees tremble.  Once again she pulled back her mouth, this time working it down her paramour’s jaw and neck, twirling small patterns with her tongue and nipping with her teeth. 

Cosima let her head tilt back in pleasure and her calves relax as Delphine descended.  She found herself biting her own lip as her lover attended to her sensitive collarbone with her mouth, and then down to the nipple not being squeezed by her fingers.  Delphine knew how Cosima enjoyed having her nipples sucked, flicked and tweaked, so she escalated the sensations with a tug of her teeth and a rapid-fire vibration of the tongue that sent a wash of desire through Cosima’s sex, making her dripping wet.

But Delphine didn’t linger too long.  She bent further, licking the soft skin under Cosima’s breast and over to her sensitive ribs.  Cosima was openly groaning now, one of her hands entangling in Delphine’s curls, the other one taking the place of the one Delphine had withdrawn from her nipple.  As Delphine folded and settled into kneeling before her, Cosima tilted her head forward again, to look at her.  Delphine had her eyes closed, suckling at her hip bone, but she looked up at the motion and their eyes met.  The Frenchwoman stared back at her intensely, locking Cosima’s gaze with her own as she moved lower to give the leather hip strap of the harness a little tug with her teeth, inserting her tongue beneath it.

 _I am going to lose my mind,_ Cosima’s brain informed her, as Delphine ran her tongue down under the strap to the junction of her thigh and crotch.  _Holy shit, she must have been preparing for this._

At that moment, one of Delphine’s hands snuck between Cosima’s legs and grabbed her ass, pulling her pelvis forward.  Her tongue dipped further and took one long, torturous lick up Cosima’s slit.

 _“Delphine,”_ Cosima couldn’t help breathing, and she thought she saw her girlfriend’s cheeks rise in the quick ghost of a smile.  Long fingers behind her dug into the curve of her ass, as two fingers of the other hand slid to her center and began rhythmically stroking her clit.  Delphine was still looking up at her, and opened her mouth and ran her tongue up the underside of the silicone shaft.  Crimson lips wrapped around the tip, her head bobbing slightly, and Cosima’s hips bucked.

“ _Jesus Christ,_ Delphine,” she groaned, and there was definitely a little bit of a devilish grin curled near the busy blonde’s eyes that time, despite her mouth being occupied.

Delphine pulled the hand at Cosima’s ass back to the front and firmly grasped the base of the cock.  She trailed another long lap down the shaft and pulled her head back, fingers still stroking at Cosima’s clit, to say, in quite possibly one of the sexiest and crudest tones Cosima had ever hear from her,

“Do you want me to suck you off?”

Whatever Cosima was expecting from this evening, this was not it.  The last she had known, Delphine had agreed to try using their new dildoes and other toys in the spirit of fun, loving experimentation.  Now, this dirty phrase, spoken in Delphine’s mellifluous Gallic lilt, uncoiled something in her belly that she hadn’t realized had been tightened.  It was a rare moment, indeed, when Cosima Niehaus’ lips struggled to form any words.

“Uh,” she began, hitting a mental block, and then, “… yes?”

She looked dumbly at her incredible girlfriend’s slyly expectant face.  _There_ was a smile.

Cosima had played with toys of this kind before, but no one had made her feel so much as though it was actually a part of her body as Delphine did.  Delphine’s tongue laved and flicked, her lips wrapping and sucking, her head moving back and forth in a slow, deep impression as her fingers stroked at Cosima’s cunt in time with each movement, dipping into her as the shaft was close to swallowed, flicking her clit when Delphine licked the tip.  Cosima had a brief thought about this illusion, and how the brain could interpret stimuli and make it feel almost real… she knew she had an open mind and a broad imagination, but god _damn_ , something about how Delphine was doing this was taking toy play to a different level.  _How in the…_

And then Delphine’s eyes met hers again as the kneeling woman pumped the now-slick dildo with her hand, and Cosima’s knees almost gave out. 

Delphine’s hand slipped out from between her legs and steadied her at the hip.  Her long, tall body unfolded from her kneeling position to rise up along Cosima’s body, ending the journey with a deep kiss.  Delphine backed off slightly again, this time biting her own lip in that _hot, hot, superhot_ way she did, Cosima thought, and she grasped the toy firmly, giving it a tug that jerked Cosima’s hips forward.

“I want more,” she simply said, and Cosima felt like there was not one field of burning lava or valley or broken glass she wouldn’t cross to give this woman any damn thing she could possibly want.

Head foggy, Cosima found herself shuffling as Delphine turned and actually led her by the cock to the armchair.  She watched as Delphine carefully plucked off her eyeglasses, placing them on the side table, and then turned around, licked her lips and placed one hand on top of Cosima’s dreadlocks.  She barely had to push, and Cosima sank to her knees.

Delphine sat in the chair, legs spread, and looked into Cosima’s eyes meaningfully.  She cocked one finger in a come-hither motion, and immediately Cosima settled between her thighs, pressing her face to the damp fabric at her lover’s crotch.

“Mmmm,” Delphine approved, as Cosima inhaled that scent again, then ran her tongue along the centre panel of the lingerie.  Cosima’s heart felt like it actually leapt at the sound, and she began to repeat the motion, up and down, over and over, while her fingers scratched along Delphine’s inner thighs and toward her sex.  Cosima snuck one finger under the leg hole of the panties and tugged, slipping her clever tongue into the gap and brushing it along the parting of sensitive lips.

Delphine grunted, hips jerking.  She pushed Cosima’s head away roughly, leaving the brunette surprised until she grabbed her hands, yanking them from her inner thighs and pulling them against the waistband of her underwear.  Cosima understood immediately and eagerly pulled the sodden material down, as Delphine raised her hips so the offending article could be pulled off.

Delphine cupped her hand around the back of Cosima’s head, and Cosima enthusiastically obliged her, licking and tongue-thrusting at her cunt, sucking at her clit, and generally eating her pussy like she had been wandering in the desert and Delphine’s sex was a lush oasis.

 _Oh, it is,_ Cosima thought, reveling in the tastes and smells, the hot, wet centre of Delphine’s physical desire.  Delphine slipped into short, sharp moans as she ground herself against her lover’s face. 

“Yes,” she encouraged, losing control more than she had expected, and feeling the fluttering inside that indicated an orgasm was close.  She writhed for a few moments, caught up in the sensations, their lust for one another, even the sounds of hot breath panting and slick, wet flesh colliding.  But then she gathered herself.  With a mumbled curse, she swiftly pushed Cosima away and stood up.  Her lover was reeling, chin coated in juices, looking as intoxicated as any time she’d ingested marijuana, as Delphine spun her around and switched places, pushing her down in the chair. 

Before Cosima could fully focus, Delphine was climbing onto the chair, her girlfriend’s hips between her knees, taking the dildo in her hand to steady it, and then sinking down slowly to take it fully inside her cunt.

“Holy _fuck_ ,” Cosima whispered, and Delphine’s eyes flew up to meet hers.  The blonde’s mouth was open, working slightly with her breath, as she began to roll her hips, grinding down on her lover with languid, but firm, arcs and thrusts.  Cosima’s eyes didn’t seem to be able to decide what to land on, flitting from Delphine’s hypnotic gaze, to her lips, her breasts, they way her neck muscles flexed, her hips and belly rolled, long, pale thighs worked and how her cunt rode the dildo, swallowing it and rubbing against the harness, generating just enough friction on Cosima’s clit to be maddening.  Cosima wasn’t sure she had ever felt so powerful and yet completely powerless at the same time, watching the love of her life fuck herself against her, fuck _her,_ taking total control.

The slow, rolling pace of the thrusts was starting to stoke an itch at the back of Cosima’s brain.  She had never seen anything more beautiful than Delphine right then, and her body was on fire with the yearning to touch more, to be touched.  But when she started to lean forward, Delphine planted a firm hand against her chest and pushed her back, sinking her shoulder blades into the padded seat back.  Delphine licked her lips.

“Not just yet, mon amour,” she murmured, half growl and half breath, and Cosima felt a jolt of desire travel her nervous system.  It was obvious Delphine was enjoying herself, enjoying her, enjoying her _watching_ , and the Frenchwoman began to undulate her entire body, thrusting herself against Cosima’s hips and closing her eyes.  Her head tilted back, lip caught in teeth, a droplet of sweat trickling down her neck.  She brought her free hand to her throat, running her fingers from the hollow at the bottom down to where the corset was encasing her breasts.  Her fingers twisted, and Cosima saw that she was tugging at the laces, untying the cords, and then her hand on Cosima’s chest was also moved to the fastening, pulling it open and letting her breasts spill free. 

Now Delphine reached for her, pulling Cosima forward so she could run her mouth down Delphine’s jaw, her neck, down to her breasts, which were now bouncing as Delphine increased the force and pace of her grinding.  Cosima’s hips began thrusting in time, the both of them grunting in exertion, Cosima’s mind filling with sparks, with the intimate knowledge she had of her love’s body, the way they knew each other’s signals, cues and tells, and now the feeling that, _fuck_ , she almost felt like a part of her _was_ inside her lover, feeling her smooth muscles clench around her.

“Yes… yes.  So good.  Oui, Cosima.  Mon dieu, I love the way you’re fucking me.  Baise-moi! Don’t stop…”

And then her whole back and neck arched back, her hands clinging to Cosima’s shoulders, and she was just making a wordless, undulating, animalistic tone, and extended “ohhhhh” of overwhelming pleasure as her hips stuttered, and Cosima could tell she was coming, coming hard enough to make her incoherent, to make her whole body shake.

Cosima felt a thrill, a deep satisfaction in her lover’s satiety, but also the short, sharp treble of a small orgasm of her own, just from having Delphine come on top of her.

They slowed down, pressing together in even, synchronous strokes, Delphine’s hands unclenching and gently holding Cosima’s head, Cosima kissing back up her neck to her cheek, her lips.  Their kisses seemed almost chaste, now, as they came down.  Over a period of time, they calmed, just holding each other, barely rocking.  Cosima smelled the sweet, heady mixture of sweat and Delphine’s perfume at her neck behind her ear.  Delphine let out an extended breath and twisted her fingers in her sweetheart’s dreads.  They both hummed.

And then Delphine’s hand was back on Cosima’s sternum, and she extended her arm, pushing the smaller woman back against the chair again.

“Oh… what?”  Cosima reacted with confused blinking, clearly not expecting the motion.  But Delphine was pulling off of her, from _around_ her, and standing up.  Looking down at Cosima, she yanked the corset the rest of the way off and threw it down, leaving herself clad only in the garters, hose, and wicked high heels.  As Cosima gaped, Delphine slid her hand from Cosima’s chest down to her hips, where she hooked her fingers under the front of the harness, pulling at Cosima until she understood and rose to her feet, as well.

“Honey—“ Cosima began to question, but Delphine silenced her with a look, her fingers finding the fasteners of the harness straps and making short work of them.  The whole ensemble dropped to the floor with a thud.

“Delphine—“ But she couldn’t even get this fully out before Delphine pressed her mouth to hers.  This kiss was hot again.  Delphine was evidently recovered and ready for… what next?

Cosima soon found out as she was taken by the shoulders and pushed front-first onto the bed.  She felt blindsided again, and barely had time to rise up on her elbows before she heard a shuffling, then clicks and snaps, and then Delphine was behind her, placing a hand gently but firmly on her back to keep her put.  There was a moment of motion from the edge of the bed as Delphine did something behind her, and then Delphine was bent over, pressing against her back with soft, hot skin, reaching down and around with a long arm and fingers to stroke her clit from the front while — _holy shit, again_ — shifting so Cosima could feel the rub of nylon straps and the solidity of the other dildo they had bought against her ass and thigh.

“Your turn,” Delphine told her softly, breath heavy on her shoulder blades, then slid her other arm around her and guided her up until she was on her hands and knees, gasping.  The arm around her middle was drawn back, and then Cosima felt Delphine run two fingers up Cosima’s thigh and to her cunt, teasing inward to test her readiness.  Satisfied by Cosima’s appreciative groan, the blonde withdrew her hand to hold the sex toy, then eased it forward, pressing the tip against slick, engorged folds, and guiding it carefully to its intended destination.

“Jesus _Fuck_ —” Cosima yelled, and then she was being filled, her girlfriend beginning a firm, moderate pace of thrusts into her, hips slapping against ass, fingers still slipping against her clit.

 _“Jesus. Fuck!_ ” she cried out again, although she couldn’t have said why those words.  She could have been saying anything, anything she could scream with force and rawness and wanting, wanting, wanting.  And she was shaking, her whole body flashing hot, flushing red, elbows starting to give and Delphine speeding up, relentless, fucking her until she could just catch instants of her nerves firing: tongue pushing forward, neck dropping, hands clutching, hips tilting, hot breath on her back on sweat and Delphine filling her, rocking against her until her cunt started grasping, throbbing, pulsating.

Delphine’s hand left her clit, but Cosima was already going.  The deep, full, rolling orgasm was taking her, inside to out.  Cosima thought she might be crying, but she wasn’t sure, and then there was a brief shift in Delphine’s motion, her torso sliding sideways from Cosima’s back, cold air hitting sweat just another sensation added to the moment, and then there was a noise, and a shocking sensation as Delphine’s hand came back to Cosima's front and pressed a buzzing vibrator against her clit.

Cosima wasn't sure how long she screamed, nor how loudly.  She was broken, flying into pieces, and the silicone olisbos was being withdrawn and replaced by shallowly rubbing fingers, and she was squirting, ejaculating with such force that she could hear the sounds of small splashes on the comforter, could feel the spray generated by the flooded vibrator flying everywhere, shooting droplets all the way up to her chest.

All this time she had thought she was sexually experienced.  But it had never been like this before.  Not this… full, bright, strong, deep.

Her trembling body had gone rigid, and her mind left it.  And maybe there was such a thing as a spirit, because Cosima felt like hers was detaching and floating, calmly, just above her forehead, reaching toward the universe, then touching it, content.

When she came back she was fully sprawled on her stomach, wetness below her from her thighs to where tears had dripped from her face.  The vibrator was turned off, but still caught beneath her, along with Delphine’s hand.  The long blonde laid soft kisses on her back, shoulders and neck.  She could hear them both panting, working back to breathing at a normal rate.

They lay that way for a few moments, too exhausted to move.  Eventually, Delphine gave a little tug with her hand, and Cosima lifted her hips so her girlfriend could remove her hand and the vibrator.  Delphine eased back and to the side gradually, pressing a kiss to the side of Cosima’s shoulder and running a hand over her paramour’s corded hair.  There were a few more moments of silence.

“D-Delphine…” Cosima finally hoarsely started, and seemed to lose momentum.  Delphine leaned over and pressed a kiss to her temple.

“How are you feeling, mon amour?”

Cosima half-chuckled.

“Amazing.  Disoriented.  Amazing.  And very, very wet.”

Delphine’s lips curled upwards and she shifted up and off the bed.  Cosima’s delayed reactions didn’t allow her to question or protest this before her love came back bearing a plush towel, and gently pushed her to roll over.

“Took note of the towel, trick, I see,” Cosima observed, a bit of a teasing, smug tone creeping back into her voice.  Delphine scoffed amusedly.

“It’s hardly a trick,” she answered, patting Cosima’s front dry, and when Cosima’s mouth opened, added, “and I should warn you:  If you at any time in this conversation refer to me as ‘padawan,’ you’re moving back in with your mother.”

“Ouch,” Cosima replied, “duly noted.”  She raised a hand and stroked Delphine’s face.

“Baby,” she changed tack, “I don’t even know… what to say.  I mean, you must have been planning for this… it was, that was just… mind-blowingly incredible.”  She rolled onto her back, blowing an exhalation toward the ceiling.  “I think I saw Cygnus OB2 at one point, there.”

“Pardon?” Delphine asked, rising and pulling a bottle of water from under the end table.  She took a sip and offered it to her rambling girlfriend.

“It’s a… a star cluster.  Named after the constellation.  Cygnus.  It’s really cool.  I meant that I, wow, I just literally saw stars for a minute, there.  Like, I was like in _2001_ for a moment, just floating there.  'My God, it’s full of stars…’”  She’d also felt like she might just die from the pleasure at one point, but she didn’t joke about that.

Delphine looked askance at her and then smirked slightly and gave her a little push.

“You know, you’ve mentioned God and Jesus a lot tonight, for a Darwinist,” she teased, kicking off her shoes and slipping off the hose and garters. “Now up.  I have to fix the bed.”

Cosima made a great show of flopping and swaying to her feet. 

“Really?  I did?  Well, Darwin was an agnostic…”

She watched as Delphine stripped off the comforter to reveal that she had placed a drop cloth underneath it, which she also rolled up and removed.

“Wow, you… you thought of everything, didn’t you,” Cosima marveled, as Delphine pulled a duvet out of the closet to spread it on the bed.  “Damn, honey, how long have you been planning this?”

Delphine grinned and nodded to the opposite side of the bed, so Cosima would go over there and pull the duvet flat.

“Doesn’t it seem a natural progression of our little project we’ve been having?  You know I love my research.”

Cosima crossed around to stand beside her and wrap her arms around her from the side.

“You are a sly one, Doctor Cormier — and so amazing," she told her, and pressed a kiss to her cheek.  Delphine’s smile spread and she turned to face her soul mate.  “Seriously.  Thank you, baby.  I’ve never… I don’t know how you…”

“Research,” Delphine repeated, kissing her on the nose.  “And yes, it was amazing.  _You’re_ amazing. And I love you.”

They shared a tender kiss, Cosima swaying lightly on her feet.

“We’re going to talk about this more, later,” she informed Delphine after a moment.  “Once I can, like, walk and talk and think and stuff.”

“Mm,” Delphine kissed her again, and stepped back.  “I’m going to finish up in the bathroom, and then I’d like nothing better than to curl up with you and drift away, mon amour.  Perhaps… to the stars?”

She gave a little wink and headed towards the bathroom, a bit of swagger in her step, despite being tired.

“You’re feeling pretty smug, huh?” Cosima called after her, flopping back onto the bed like her bones had been softened.  “Well, you go on with that.  You deserve it.”

Delphine may have hummed in reply, but Cosima’s eyelids were already drooping.  The next thing she knew, she was stirring awake to the feeling of her love wrapping her arm and the duvet around her, and all the candles were out.

“Whuh…” Cosima mumbled.  Despite how dim it was, she could see Delphine smiling at her.

“Go to sleep, my love. Je t’aime.”

“Mm.  Love you.  I totally want you to know, I’m gonna get you back for that.  I mean… surprises and shit.  Rocking your world…”  Her voice was fading, beginning to slur.

“That’s very nice, mon cœur,” Delphine mollified her, “and you know, the toy store we went to has some lovely series of talks and Q and As, should you be interested.  I went to some very informative ones led by a woman called ‘Trick.’”

“Mm?” Cosima knew she was missing some kind of teasing or joke, here, but she couldn’t keep her eyes open any longer.  “’K.  ‘Night.  I’m lucky.  You're awesome.  I love you.”

She didn’t see how Delphine’s smile lingered, looking at her sleeping love and knowing how she’d surprised her, how she’d made her feel.  Her body was tired, too, warmed by some energetic, emotional hum of satisfaction.  She felt they’d been opening to each other more and more, and that it could go on like that, only getting stronger, better, over time.  She let herself sink into dreams, as if lifted of some burden. 

She would never worry about _“it showed,”_ again.

 

 


	6. Part VI

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I thought this collection was over, just like the show... but I got so many requests. I hope this chapter lives up to the prompts I got for a little what-what. And yes, I had to make a pun. ;)
> 
> Drop me a comment if you enjoy, eh?

“So, are we ever going to talk about your butt plug?”

 

Cosima gave an involuntary jerk, the twitch of her fingers as Delphine’s question surprised her causing the wooden rectangle she was holding to tap against the others, knocking them off balance and sending them sliding in different directions, the entire Jenga tower collapsing on itself with a sudden and decisive racket.  

 

Cosima blinked a couple times and then looked up at her girlfriend over the top of her glasses.  Across the coffee table, Delphine’s casual gaze was being threatened by a quirk of her lips at one corner, a dimple divoting her cheek and her nostrils flaring.  As the exasperated clone continued to stare at her in flat glare of peeved disbelief for a moment, Delphine couldn’t help but let out one snort of repressed laughter, her shoulders shaking as she looked down to compose herself, before looking up again with feigned innocence.

 

“Really?”  Cosima asked her, eyebrows rising.  “You are  _ such  _ a freaking cheater, Cormier.”

 

“It’s a valid question,” Delphine pointed out, raising a glass to take a sip of her wine to gain her composure.

 

“Really,” Cosima confirmed, dropping the  game piece in her fingers with a disdainful flick.  “You are  _ so  _ lucky you didn’t pull that when Sarah and Felix are here.”

 

“You think?”  Delphine asked, looking exaggeratedly contemplative.  “Maybe I’ll say it again after they arrive.  Anyway, they’ll probably have goaded you in much more colourful ways than that.”

 

“You know they can never get to me.  I’m the champion of this game.  That was just a low blow, you dirty cheater.”

 

“‘Low?’  ‘Dirty?’  Are we finally going to talk about the butt plug now?” Delphine smirked, making Cosima groan and clutch her temples.

 

“I can’t believe I just walked into that.  I think I need another bowl.”  She leaned over to retrieve her cannabis imbibing implements from under the table.

 

“Mm,” Delphine nodded.  “We all know it’s getting just the right amount of high that gives you your nonchalantly steady Jenga hands.  Are you sure you want to jeopardize that by smoking too much and veering into giggling uncontrollably or flailing clumsily?”  Cosima responded by sticking her tongue out as she began packing her vape with ground flower.  Delphine smirked at the terminology her lover used.  Having an occasional lapse with nicotine, herself, she could appreciate how using words like “smoke” and “bowl” could feel almost intrinsic to the habit.  Instead of commenting on that, however, she added, “Are you going to answer my first question?”

 

Cosima shot her another look as she watched the temperature indicator on her rig rise.  She took a pull when it hit the right number, and they both paused until she let it out.

 

“You’re seriously asking me about my butt plug?  Not that those aren’t the cutest two words in the world when you say them.”

 

“Oui,” Delphine smiled, “I’m seriously asking you, even if it is in a joking way.  And you and I both know your sister and brother-sestra won’t get here anything less than fashionably late.  When Kira doesn’t come, game night gets much more, em, loosey-goosey.”

 

Cosima sputtered out the breath she was trying to hold in a burst of laughter at Delphine’s accent shaping the colloquialism.  She never got tired of that.  She had to cough a bit after that, even if she wasn’t actually smoking.

 

“Are you alright?” Delphine asked, then moved on when Cosima waved her hand and nodded.  “Honestly, I’ve wanted to ask for a while, now.  This just felt like… a good moment.”  Cosima raised an eyebrow at that.

 

“Riiiiight,” she nodded, with a half-roll of her eyes.  “Nothing to do with cheating.” She put her vapourizer back down.  “Well, I didn’t know this was something you were thinking about.  What do you wanna ask?”

 

“Ah, well, it’s just, we’ve been trying different things, and I’ve really been enjoying them, and I can tell you have been, too.  But I remember the one in your toy box… glass, is it?  And it was a while ago that you first showed that to me.  So, I thought maybe, maybe you didn’t feel ready to show it to me, for some reason.  But, eh, I wanted to know if you had it because you liked to use it, or if was more of a… dolphin dildo situation, I guess.”  Cosima chuckled at that, but Delphine reached over the table and touched the back of Cosima’s hand with her fingertips lightly.  “You know you don’t have to worry about sharing things with me, by now, don’t you?”

 

Cosima nodded, although her eyes focused downward in thought for a moment.

 

“Yeah, I know.  I know.”  She looked up again.  “Although you might want to rethink that for when I reveal my tentacle fetish.”  They stared at each other for a second before Cosima’s tongue poked through her teeth in a give-away grin.  Delphine smacked the hand she’d been touching.

 

“ _ Fille impossible _ ,” she accused, and Cosima laughed.

 

“Okay, okay,” the shorter scientist assuaged, “we can talk about it, if you want.  I guess I just was, like, working you up bit by bit to the kinkier stuff.  I mean,  _ I _ don’t find it that kinky, but some people do, and I have had the experience of a girl being turned off by it.”  Delphine blew out a little puff of air through pursed lips and shrugged.

 

“Well, it’s nothing you have to be worried about me being turned off by.  I mean, I am a doctor, you know.  We’ve talked about this.  As long as proper care is taken to keep things safe, I’m fine with them.  It  _ is _ one of the erogenous zones, for many people. You know, sometimes I think you act as though I’m somehow a complete innocent.  I have had plenty of adult sexual experiences before.”

 

“Yes, I know, I know that,” Cosima nodded, this time reaching out to take Delphine’s hand reassuringly with her own.  “ _ Please, _ I mean… yeah, you’re right, we’ve been having a really good time.”  Her lips began to twitch into a sly grin as lighter hazel eyes met her own, and Delphine smiled in kind.  “A really, _ really  _ good time,” Cosima clarified.  “In fact, you know I’m still trying to figure out how to get you back for that first night with the strap-ons and the teddy.”  

 

Delphine’s eyelids lowered slightly, her gaze turning seductive.  

 

“I think you’ve have ‘gotten me back’ several times, but I won’t press the point, because I don’t mind if you keep trying,” she said.

 

“Mmm,” Cosima hummed.  “Don’t mind if I do.  But I bet as soon as I start trying now, those cockney asshats will show up.  Same with the butt plug discussion.  Can we just table it until we have more us, alone, time?”

 

“Of course,” Delphine nodded, beginning to gather the wooden pieces back together. “I just wanted you to know if you’d been avoiding it you didn’t have to.”  There was a buzz and Cosima picked up her phone and checked it.

 

“It’s them, downstairs, of course.  See what I’m telling you?”  She pressed the button on her phone to open the front door for her family and rose to let them in the apartment door when they arrived.  She knew they’d have a minute before the elevator made the trip, so she glanced back at Delphine.  “Have you been going to more of those workshops at the toy store, again?” 

 

Delphine smiled, shaking her head, and rose to greet their guests when they arrived.

 

“Not lately,” she informed her love, “but it is something I’ve done some research on.”

 

“Of course it is,” Cosima chuckled, then turned to open the door when they heard the voices of the bickering siblings carrying down the hall.

 

*****

  
  


“Uhnnnnggg,” Delphine moaned the next morning, rolling over to find Cosima propped up on one elbow smirking at her.

 

“Somebody have too much scotch?” the clone asked playfully.  Delphine barely opened her eyelids when she rolled her eyes at her.  “You were in rare form last night.  Gotta say, I never thought I’d see you go toe-to-toe with Sar on drinking.  Toe-to-toe.  Mano y maaahnooo.”

 

“Uhngh, it was the only way to tolerate her,” Delphine mumbled, her voice lower and thicker than sounded healthy.  “And I thought  _ you  _ were a brat.”

 

“Ah, but I’m a  _ cute _ brat,” Cosima opined, batting her eyelashes.  “She’s just, like, the _ worst  _ of the evil brats, that one.”  Delphine grunted in response and Cosima chuckled.  “She’s fucking hilarious.”

 

“Ugh, too many sisters,” Delphine mumbled, rolling over and pulling a pillow over her head.  

“I thought the best part was when Sarah was pretending to talk like Helena, and then Helena was trying to talk like Sarah, and then Felix was trying to talk like you.  But then it got to the moon question!”  Cosima started laughing, prompting Delphine to peek out from under the pillow and give her the stink eye.

 

“It ees the Earth’s. EUHn-ly.  Natural satellite, Sarah,” Cosima cackled, doing a terrible, exaggerated impression of Delphine’s accent.  “‘Ey, Oi haven’t got a bloody clue what you’re gettin’ at, Frenchie,” she continued, in an equally awful British accent, cracking herself up.  “And the whole time she was just yanking your chain!”

 

Delphine peered at her, puffy-eyed and yet still witheringly, somehow.

 

“You know, you always say my accent is sexy, but when you use it, I don’t get it,” she deadpanned.  Cosima snorted.

 

“Aw, are you feeling a little hung over?”  she asked a little more quietly, but still too brightly for her partner.

 

“Sarah’s accent on the other hand,” Delphine informed her, “ _ c’est manifique. _  Sometimes when you’re not here I just… listen to her voice mail messages I’ve saved over and over again.”

 

“Alright, alright, that’s enough of that,”  Cosima surrendered, looking a bit more put out than necessary for a joke.  “Hey, I have an idea.  Let’s take a nice shower and go directly to the diner.  Get you a nice, greasy, omelette and some caffeine to nip that business in the bud.  Do not pass go, do not collect $200.”

 

“Mm, it sounds like a good idea, but I’m not sure I have it in me to get up, just yet.”  Delphine sighed, pulling the pillow back over her face.

 

“Okay, you get a half an hour, and then I’m hauling you to the shower.  You know you’ll feel worse if you sleep too long, too.”

 

“Yes,” Delphine mumbled from under the pillow, one hand raising to wave in the air for a moment before it found and patted Cosima’s cheek none-too-gently.  Cosima snickered and kissed the palm on her face, then got up to stretch and make some coffee.

 

*****

 

Despite having started out breakfast looking even paler than usual with dark circles under her eyes, the ham-and-cheese omelette with hash browns, coffee, water and a bloody mary (“hair of the dog that bit ya, although they’re not spicy enough here,” according to Cosima) seemed to have done Delphine a world of good.  

 

“So, did you want to go see that movie today?  We also haven’t seen that gallery show with the, bioluminescence thingies.”  Cosima waved her hands up and down in a slow sweep, wriggling her fingers in little flicks to denote a shimmer.  Delphine smiled lazily, just looking at her.  “What?”  Cosima asked, grinning back.

 

“What do you say we take a little walk down to the market,” Delphine suggested, “and we get some of the fresh bread we like and some treats, and then go home and just hang out, read or watch a movie or something… something quiet, just you and me.”  She took one of Cosima’s hands that had fluttered down to rest on the table and entwined their fingers, her smile spreading softly, golden eyes meeting hazel-brown.  Cosima nodded.

 

“Sounds good to me,” she agreed.  “If you’ll remember, I did all the clean-up last night, so we don’t have to do anything but make dinner tonight.”

 

“Yes, I know you did,” Delphine acknowledged, knowing this was Cosima’s way of teasing her about having too much to drink and moaning at the mess.  “I very much appreciate it.  And I will make us sandwiches with the bread and that manchego-style cheese you like.”  Even if her tone was a little teasing in return, it was the praise Cosima was looking for, so the smaller woman poked her tongue lightly between her teeth and rose with her partner.

 

“Done and done,” she pronounced, anchoring the tip under the salt shaker on their way out.

 

*****

 

They had been reading quietly, contentedly, when a gust came through the open window and ruffled Delphine’s hair and the pages of her book.  She looked up as Cosima made a little “brr” noise from her end of the couch and rose, quick-stepping to close the offending sash.  Cosima turned right around and rushed back to the couch, but instead of returning to the opposite end from Delphine she picked up a throw and shuffled over to her, clearly looking for her lover to shift so they could snuggle.  Delphine smiled and adjusted, leaning back against the armrest and turning her legs lengthwise across the cushions, expecting Cosima to sit between them and recline against her.  Cosima had a different idea, however, and began making little jerky motions with her arms, accompanied by expressions and muttered “no, like, that way, like… sideways” until Delphine understood and laid on one side along the length of the couch.  Cosima then slotted herself in against her girlfriend like a little spoon, tugging the throw over them and squirreling into it until it covered them both up to their chests.  Delphine chuckled and Cosima shot her a look.

 

“What?  It’s cold!” she insisted, and Delphine hmmmed, placing her book on the shorter woman’s hip.

 

“Far be it from me to let you get a chill, but it’s not so easy reading in this position.  Unless you’ll let me get some pillows?”

 

“No,” Cosima protested, “then my back will get cold.”  Delphine regarded her with a small smile, and dropped the book to the floor, slipping her arm around her partner.

 

“You know, I might think that you were trying to get me to stop reading at all,” Delphine observed.

 

“Hmm. Ya think?” Cosima asked, shifting back a little so Delphine got a faceful of corded hair.  “Maybe I just don’t wanna freeze to death.”

 

“Actually, I  _ do  _ think,” Delphine insisted lowly, moving her lips to the shell of the ear before her so her breath warmed it.  “And I also think you know how I love the way the curve of your ass fits right here so perfectly,” she said, shifting her arm down to tug Cosima’s hips back and press her bum more snugly against her pelvis.  Cosima let out a little groan, and ran her palm down the arm squeezing her.

 

“You also know it always turns me on the way you say ‘ass,’” Cosima answered, her voice also slipping lower.  Delphine responded by sliding her hand back over Cosima’s hip and down to palm one round ass cheek.

 

“I think you like it more when I squeeze it,” Delphine informed her, tightening her fingers around the curve, “or when I give it a little smack.”  She followed this up with a teasing spank, limited by the crowded area but swift enough to make a little sound.  Cosima gasped.

 

“Speaking of which…” Delphine began, and Cosima started chuckling.  She reached behind herself to run her hand down Delphine’s thigh took over where her girlfriend left off. 

 

“I can tell what you’re thinking, and yes, this is a good opening for you to ask me about my butt plug.  No pun intended.”

 

They both giggled a bit, then Delphine propped herself up a bit on her elbow so she could see Cosima’s face clearly.  “Yes?  I was wondering if you didn’t want to talk about it, but I thought maybe if you had it, it was for a reason…”

 

“Yeah, well,” Cosima paused to turn herself over so they were facing each other.  They were slender enough to both fit, but Cosima hooked her top leg around her partner’s just to be safe.  “So, right, you know how I like it sometimes when you squeeze my ass, or smack it a little bit.”

 

“Oui,” Delphine acknowledged, her eyes fixed  on her lover with obvious attraction and intent.  “And when I give it a little kiss,” she added, giving the body part in question a small pinch.

 

“Mmhmm,” Cosima smiled, after a little inrush of breath,  “Well, the truth is that I totally enjoy more than that,  I mean, I like a lot of things, you know that.  But sometimes there’s nothing quite like getting fucked in the ass.”  The sibilance at the end of the word extended into a brief hiss, as Cosima bared her teeth a little an almost animalistic snarl. 

 

“Aha,” Delphine said, eyebrows rising.  “Well, if that’s what you like, what you want, of course I’m open to… helping you out.”

 

“Oh,  _ excellent, _ ” Cosima grinned, her leg flexing and tugging Delphine closer.  “I know, you’re right, I haven’t talked about this before, but as I said, I did have some experiences with other girls not being into it, and I’ve noticed, well…”  She pursed her lips and tugged them a little sideways, thinking, then carried on.  “I’ve noticed that sometimes when I go for your ass you kind of… shy away, or something.”

 

“Ah,” Delphine paused for a moment, thoughtful.  “I guess… I have no problem with doing it to you, if that’s what you like.  You’re always sexy to me, my love.  But… anal sex has never been my interest.  For me, I mean.”

 

“Huh,” Cosima said, leaning back a bit to look at her.  “Have you ever… have you ever tried it?”

 

“Yes,” Delphine said with a small shrug.  “I’ve been with men who enjoyed it, and… sometimes I would do it.  But, it never really… aroused me, I guess.  It just felt… awkward?  Sometimes, uncomfortable?”

 

Cosima propped herself up on her elbow this time.

 

“Did it hurt?”  She asked, with some concern.

 

“No, I mean, a little?  But we used lube and condoms and first did it slowly.  You know, I’ve never been the kind of girl who would just let something hurt and go on with it.  This was more like… I didn’t get the appeal, but, if they liked it and I cared for them, it was something I could do.”

 

“Hmm.  So, not pleasurable at all?” Cosima questioned.

 

“Not so much, but if it was someone I really liked, was really attracted to, it could be nice to feel how aroused they got, how much they enjoyed it.  It wasn’t that much of a bother.  Just, for me, a bit of a bore.”

 

Cosima regarded her for a moment, gears obviously turning.

 

“I’m surprised,” she finally said.  “I mean, everyone is different, but it is an area dense in nerve endings.  And, like, some people are disgusted by butt sex and some like it… and I guess some people put up with something that’s annoying to make their sex partners happy… but boring, I wouldn’t have thought of.  I mean, was it that with your body language when I’d get close to touching you there, was it just like, ‘nah, let’s keep to what really interests me?’  Because I’ll admit I was afraid it was more like ‘God, please don’t.’”

 

“Oh. No.  Not like that,” Delphine reassured her, angling herself up to the same level.  “I, euh, I suppose maybe there could be a little uncomfortableness in that I don’t want to mislead you.  It’s not a huge deal… but, well, there’s just so much else I’d rather do.  I’m happy to do it to you, that’s no problem.  Is it something that is important for you to do to me?”

 

“Nooo… it’s not that.”  Cosima tilted her head, musing.  “For me, I really enjoy it, but if you didn’t want to do it to me, we could negotiate it, you know?  Like, we could work it out.  Thinking about it, I’d be…” she let out a quick laugh “I’d be  _ bummed, _ I was gonna say.”  They chuckled together.  “But I’d understand.  However, if you actually are okay with it, like when you say you’d be ‘happy’ to do it, then I’d like us to try it.”

 

Delphine nodded.

 

“Yes, of course I meant it.  I love your curves, your bottom.  I never felt this way about any men I was with… I mean, I can appreciate a fit man’s shape, but with you... I do find myself looking at yours and enjoying touching it.  And, you know, when we have vaginal sex, but I’m behind you… I find that really sexy.  Partially because it feels good pressing against you, but also because you so obviously enjoy it.”

 

“That I do,” Cosima agreed, practically growling, and leaned forward to press a soft, slow kiss to Delphine’s lips.  She pulled back with a small grin. “But I am curious.  I may be biased, but it’s hard to imagine anal sex feeling  _ boring, _ of all things.  Then again, you were doing it with straight men…”  Delphine smirked slightly at this.

 

“Yes, I know.  I know your opinion on that.  And far be it from me to destroy my reputation as a ‘budding lesbian,’ is it?”  Cosima laughed.  “Regardless of labeling, since I have only been with one woman and have not wanted to be with anyone else since, our data set is a little small.  I still contend that men can be very successful lovers, but that everything is special with you.”

 

“Music to my ears,” Cosima chuckled, “and I’m not going to be pushing you towards any other women to check on all this.  But my theory that pleasure may have steeper learning curve in some areas of heterosexual sex is still pretty sound.  I mean, for people who aren’t taught right and don’t do enough research, of course.  Then again, with all the taboos in this culture… ugh, whatever, let’s just go back to you saying everything is special with me.”

 

“It is,” Delphine smiled, kissing her nose.

 

“So, on that note… what if… would you mind if we engaged in a little friendly experimentation?”  Cosima asked slyly.

 

“Such as?” Delphine wasn’t going to blindly say yes.

 

“Can we fool around and maybe see if there’s anything you like?  And if you aren’t in the mood or it doesn’t do anything, no harm no foul?  ‘Cause, well, you know I like a challenge… and it does seem a little like a waste of good real estate, if me being special might make a difference, that is.”

 

Delphine let out a full laugh this time.

 

“Alright, yes.  Only because you are special, and so curious.  And yes, I trust you to listen to what I say.  After all, our experiments so far have led to some pretty amazing results.”

 

“You mean, like… crazy science?”  Cosima asked, tongue poking out from behind her teeth.

 

“Yes, like that,” Delphine agreed, with a roll of her eyes, and pulled her in for a kiss. Cosima responded, but then pulled back, her eyes squinched up in thought.

 

“Just one thing: what about gay guy porn?  You seem to be into it when they do anal stuff there.  Is it more, just like, they're into it and you get vicarious enjoyment, even if it's not anal sex, per se, that does it for you?”  Delphine nodded in response.

 

“Yes, I’d say that's accurate.  After all, they have prostate glands, so it's more pleasurable than just a feeling of fullness, for them, according to what I’ve read and heard.   I will admit there's a voyeuristic thrill on my part, although, obviously not in a… ‘peeping Tom?’”  She furrowed her brow in question, and her girlfriend chuckled.

 

“Yeah, that's the right saying,” Cosima affirmed.

 

“Right, so, not in a peeping Tom kind of way, because I know they’re willingly being filmed.  I… I do still find the male body can be attractive.  I think it might also be you were onto something when you mentioned it is a taboo that subverts the, the prevailing culture of gender, and so on.  You and I know men have been having sex with each other since, mm, well, for human history, I suppose.  But there is so much resistance to it that we seldom see men being receptive with each other in that way… romantically, sexually… unless we look for it, specifically.  And, at the same time, there can be a certain aggressiveness, and the very  _ otherness  _ of it can be stimulating.”

 

“I get that, I think.  It’s kind of rebellious, in itself, and it's also kind of removed.”

 

“Hmm, maybe,” Delphine shrugged.  “But, well… is something we have to fully analyze right now?  Because I was very much enjoying kissing a certain woman…”  She brushed her lips against her lover's, finishing with a soft kiss to the corner of her mouth.

 

“Um, yes, please, Dr. Cormier,” Cosima grinned, returning the favour.  She pressed against her partner, and soon their kisses grew longer, more searching, their breaths becoming heavier.  Delphine caressed Cosima’s bottom through her pants, then moved her hand up to the small of her back, sliding her fingers down beneath her waistband.  When her fingers brushed Cosima’s crack, the smaller woman shivered a bit, but grabbed her wrist to stop her and pulled back.

 

“Whoa, hold on a minute,”  Cosima panted, causing Delphine to look at her with a furrowed brow.  “I’m totally into this, but I need to get ready first.”

 

“Get ready?” Delphine ask, clearly not fully emerged from the spell of their makeout session.

 

“Yeah, like, clean myself, and stuff.  Can you wait?”

 

“Hm?”  Delphine thought for a second.  “Ah, wait.  You mean, uh, to wash yourself out?  Like an anal douche?”  Cosima let out a bark of laughter.

 

“Well, there are two words I didn’t expect to come out of your mouth.  Of course, with the gay porn fixation and the classes with little Miss Trick…”  she teased.

 

“You are impossible,” Delphine told her leaning back and giving her a reproachful look.  “You are always very happy with what I’ve learned from my research.  So, are you going to do whatever you want to do so I can fuck you in the ass, or not?”

 

Cosima nearly fell on the floor.

 

“Oh,  _ wow _ .  Sir, yes sir, ma’am!” she saluted and scrambled upright and around the couch.  “Oh,  _ man, _ ” she blurted excitedly, and leaned over the back of the couch to give the blonde a rough kiss before running out of the room.  “Just make yourself comfortable!”  Cosima’s voice carried from the hallway she was scurrying down toward the bathroom.  Delphine just bit her lip, covered her face with her hands and laughed.

 

******

 

There was just something about seeing her lover aroused.

 

Of course Delphine had been with lovers before, and the act of looking was pleasurable.  Admittedly, she wasn’t strongly attracted to some of the men she’d slept with, but it was nice to feel wanted, and even more so when she was with someone she actually liked, maybe even had what could almost be called a relationship with.  She was attracted to men, and she still could find men attractive, but with Cosima… with Cosima, it was something more.

 

Cosima was the whole package.  She was insanely smart, smart enough to get what Delphine thought and talked about most of the time, or to have the curiosity and interest to find out about what she didn’t understand, just as Delphine was motivated to do for her.  Even when she was dopey she was kind of cute, and usually figured things out.  She was scientific but oddly spiritual.  She was wry and silly, deeply kind, but with an edge when pushed.  She was flirty, and  _ mon dieu _ was she good with her body, her mouth, her hands.  She seemed to have very little shame during sex, so of course the dance around the discovered plug toy had been noticeable.  

 

There was something about Cosima.  Something about her energy that affected Delphine from the first time they met, but when it came to sex, seeing Cosima turned on: her chest heaving, lips swollen, face and chest flushed, the curves of her body and the grip and reach and flow and thrust of her hands, the roll of the muscles beneath her skin, her petite body compact with strength yet so, so soft, her eyes slightly unfocused when her glasses were off, but looking so, so intently at Delphine with such want and awe, until she squeezed them shut in oblivion; there was something about all these things that Delphine could never get enough of, not even if she’d had a hard day or her arm muscles were burning with effort or Cosima had gotten crumbs in the bed  _ again.   _ (“The Munchies,” as far as she was concerned, was not a good enough excuse.)

 

They had been together long enough now that they didn’t expect sex as often.  They no longer felt they had to make up for all the times they had been separated from each other or gone without during the harrowing earlier days taken up by murderous corporations, agencies and religions and wild sub-plots.  They no longer felt the constant pressure of Cosima’s progressive illness, the derailing fear.  They had lives, now, mostly normal, sometimes distracting, despite all that, and a real relationship.  So, they were grumbly sometimes or they were content coming home to just hang out and maybe talk or do their own thing and cuddle up in bed at night to rest.  

 

But the sex.  Whether it was tender love-making, a quick romp or they had both cleared their calendars for something more intense or adventurous, it was great.  And there was something about it, something about looking at Cosima and seeing her desires and her fulfilment play across her face, something about bending down to her and enveloping her and being enveloped, being  _ inside  _ her, pulsing and hot, and knowing how it felt to have Cosima inside, as well, well…

 

It was different.  It was  _ better,  _ Delphine thought, than with anyone else.  By _ far. _

 

And, praise be to whatever caused it, she knew, she could tell, Cosima felt the same way.

 

So, maybe it was a little odd, a little new, but it wasn’t awkward, really.  Hardly at all.

 

Cosima had taken her time and then insisted they have a glass of wine and listen to some music.  So they had, and they had danced, slowly, to something low and mellow.  They kissed, softly at first, then deeply, escalating quickly from when Cosima pulled her into the bedroom and began to undress her.  Sometimes they made undressing a show, but this time they stripped each other, taking a moment to appreciate each revelation of flesh, to kiss and stroke.  Delphine slipped a thigh between Cosima’s legs and Cosima bent one of hers to press against Delphine’s sex.  They undulated, rolling against one another, Delphine working her mouth down Cosima’s neck, to her shoulder, paying attention to her clavicle and the flesh around her breasts, then looking up to meet Cosima’s eyes before taking her nipple into her mouth, sucking lightly and laving it with her tongue.  Cosima’s little grunts and noises gave her a little jolt of pleasure and satisfaction as she did, and they were both moving deeper into the rhythm of it, rocking stronger.

 

Delphine drew her attention to the other breast and felt a still-wanting sort of satisfaction when Cosima threaded her hands into Delphine’s hair and gripped her head, groaning.  She obliged Cosima’s body signals by taking her breast further into her mouth, sucking a bit more roughly, and running her teeth to the tip, while rolling the other nipple between her thumb and forefinger.  

 

“Shit, baby,” Cosima hissed, and arched into her, the spot where Cosima’s cunt had been against her thigh suddenly feeling cold as the shift in position briefly parted the contact, the hot wetness touching plain air.  Delphine would have smiled if she hadn’t had her mouth full.

 

She worked her hands down and slid them beneath her lover, beginning to knead and stroke the firm curves of her derrière.  Cosima writhed more, another guttural moan escaping from her, and in knowing how much Cosima was enjoying it, Delphine felt her own excitement ratchet up, her own pussy pulsing and growing wet.

 

Delphine took Cosima’s buttocks in her hands and squeezed them a bit more gently, just barely pulling them apart, and traced her fingers down, dipping just slightly into the crack between the mounds.

 

“Fuuuuck,” Cosima affirmed, and Delphine pulled her head up and looked at her.

 

“Tell me what you like.  Tell me what you want me to do,” she said.

 

“Uhfff,” Cosima let out a breath, closing her eyes, then looked back up at Delphine, her gaze half-lidded.  “I’m gonna turn over, okay?  Just… just keep touching me… you can, like, touch and massage my sides, my back, and down to my ass.  Just keep working me, baby.  It feels so good.”

 

Delphine nodded, and pushed herself up on her knees.  Cosima flipped over quickly, pushing her hair to one side of her head and exposing her neck.  Delphine latched onto it with her mouth, humming, and began stroking Cosima’s shoulders, then down to her back and sides, her mouth trailing after to suck and kiss at the nape, the pulse point, shoulder and between the shoulder blades.  Cosima moaned, letting herself enjoy it fully, revelling in the attention of the amazing woman she felt so fortunate to have somehow landed.  She was fully absorbing the touch of Delphine’s hands as they ran down the plane of her back on either side of her spine, neither too firmly nor too lightly to satisfy, the heat and the press of them causing Cosima’s erector spinae to loosen and lengthen, then ripple with a flutter than forced something curiously like a purr out of her mouth.

 

“Uhhhh,” she moaned, releasing a held breath.  “Yes, baby.  I love the way you touch me.”

 

Delphine’s mouth twitched into a smile as it continued working kisses down the ladder of her lover’s spine.

 

_ “Oui?”  _ she teased softly, reverting to her mother tongue both because moments like this brought her deeper self out of her, and because she knew it turned Cosima on.  “I love the taste of you.  Your back… the curve of your waist to your backside, they’re so, mm, lovely. You want me to touch you like this?”  She smoothed her hands down to Cosima’s ass and gave her cheeks a slow, massaging squeeze, running her fingers into the indentations that formed in the sides when Cosima squeezed her buttocks together in delight.

 

“Fuuuuck, yeah,” Cosima moaned, raising one arm to flail distractedly at the nightstand.  “Shit, I can’t wait long.  Please get the lube, baby, and touch my hole.”

 

Delphine’s eyebrows might have raised a bit, but mostly in interest at how responsive Cosima was being, and it was not like her girlfriend could see it.  She reached over and grabbed the lube, opening it and applying it liberally to her fingers.  If she learned one thing from both the toy shop and her medical rotations, it was to never skimp on the lube.

 

Cosima was arching her back, now, in a positively primal display, her lithe waist contrasting with the exaggerated voluptuousness of her hips and rear end as she pushed them upwards and back towards her lover.  Despite not having had this particular experience with Cosima before, Delphine had definitely, if unexpectedly, felt the pull at her groin now and then when catching sight of this attractive, sensual woman bent over or swaying her hips just so.  To see her spread out and aching, bare, pleading with her body language, caused the Frenchwoman to suck her own lip between her teeth in a hiss and bite, just remembering to make sure she’d warmed the lube in her hands enough before sliding two fingers in slow exploration down the proffered cleft.  Cosima’s little hole was a dusky colour, like her nipples, puckered and clean, expectantly opening and closing in a way that Delphine suddenly found neither basic as a function nor overly private or taboo, but a vulnerable, erotic offering, both somehow cute and worthy of reverence.  She found herself intrigued by the feel of the wrinkled ring against the whorls of her fingertips, slippery yet tactile.  Cosima’s ass pulsed at her touch, the smaller woman’s head collapsing into the pillow and another groan being pulled from deep within her to rumble in her throat.  Delphine traced the circle softly, with gentle presses to the center just hinting at near-entrance, making sure the lubrication was spread everywhere.

 

“Uhn, yeah, you can… you can start pressing in… please,” Cosima told her, and when Delphine slipped one fingertip through the tight ring of muscle and into the soft heat within, Cosima’s hips fluttered, a movement caught between a jerk and trying to stay very still, and another low  _ ohhhhh _ came out of her.  Delphine found herself smiling.

 

It was slow, but not as slow as Delphine had expected.  She worked the first knuckle of her finger in and out smoothly, adding lube as she went, and Cosima responded with soft affirmations and a sheen of sweat breaking out across her back.  Soon, Cosima was lifting her hips upward, encouraging deeper entry, and Delphine found herself fucking her love’s ass firmly, if at a leisurely pace, with one full finger.  The muscles in Cosima’s back rippled enticingly, and Delphine felt suddenly moved to flatten her other hand and give one cheek of the rolling backside before her a surprising swat.  She was briefly uncertain for a moment as it happened, but then Cosima sucked in a hiss and grunted:

 

_ “Yes.” _

 

That set them both off.

 

Soon, compelled by the pleasure and barely understandable verbal guidance of her amoureuse below her, Delphine had two fingers plunged inside, slippery-sliding while undulating in measured waves, feeling the squeeze and press of Cosima’s contractions around her knuckles.  Delphine had given the round mounds before her enough small but sharp smacks to turn them a pleasant pink, and Cosima definitely was appreciating it.  

 

“Oh, oh… shit… baby, just… please get the plug, now, okay?”  The begging tone in Cosima’s voice nearly made Delphine jump to the side table in haste, but she remembered just in time to withdraw carefully, first, eliciting an almost bereft-sounding sigh from her lady.

 

The glass toy wasn’t very long, and it was smooth, but it was definitely thicker than her fingers, near the bottom where it flared.  Delphine considered it for a moment.

 

“I… I suppose I should have warmed it up, somehow,” she apologized.

 

“No, no, it’s okay.  I forgot, too.  Could’ve just shoved it under my stomach,” Cosima answered.  “Hold on.  Here, just give it to me.”  She turned to look over her shoulder and held out her hand.  Delphine leaned down and passed it to her, and watched with widened eyes as the Cosima quickly slipped the whole implement into her mouth to its base.

 

“Oh,” Delphine observed, and Cosima nearly smiled around the mouthful.

 

“Mm-hm,” she replied, darting her tongue out a bit to run it around the thickest part.  She sucked on it, pulling it slightly in and out of the O of her lips for a few moments, giving Delphine a low-lidded, lascivious look.  Delphine seemed to quite lose herself for a bit, going still as she watched.  Then Cosima released it from her mouth with a wet pop.

 

“Lube it up really well, baby,” Cosima told her.  “Then put it inside me.”

 

Delphine complied.

 

It was slow, and indeed slippery.  Cosima had to reach around and take control at one point, guiding the toy just so, when Delphine’s angle was a little off.  But then it was in, Cosima letting out a extended, guttural noise as the widest part finally slid home, her interior walls locking it in place.  She looked over her shoulder at Delphine, again, observing how her lover was watching her.

 

“Do you like that?” she asked the blonde.

 

_ “Oui,” _ Delphine breathed.  Then, louder: “I love how much you’re enjoying it.  It’s so sexy.   _ C’est… captivant.” _

 

“Yeah?” Cosima grinned.  “Is that what I think it is?  Are you fucking dripping on me?”

 

Delphine flushed from her roots down, her hips canting automatically to meet the back of Cosima’s thigh, where her arousal had, indeed, already made its mark.

 

Cosima sighed, and squirmed a little, but froze as Delphine pushed harder against her, the French woman’s hip pressing against the plug.

 

“Easy,” Cosima hissed.  “You can like, move and tap it a little… but I’m kind of sensitive.  I kind of like it just being there, right now… being full.”

 

“Okay,” Delphine nodded, and shifted her hip away.  She touched the base of the toy lightly, shifting it just a little bit, then tapped it.  Her mouth moved to the back and side of Cosima’s neck again, nipping and sucking, and she slid her wetness against her lover’s thigh until the both began to undulate together in a rhythm.

 

“Ohhh...” Cosima’s noise was definitely of approval.  She reached behind her, gripping at Delphine’s hip with one hand.  “Yeah,” she said.  “Yeah.”

 

Their sweat was mingling now, their movements getting faster.  Delphine found herself biting at her lover’s neck just below her ear, her free hand clutching at the shoulder in front of her.

 

“Wait…” Cosima said, slowing, and Delphine obliged.  Cosima shifted, rising up a little on her elbows and knees.  She held out her hand, and Delphine caught the hint and offered her free hand to be taken.  Cosima took command of Delphine’s hand and pulled it down across her belly and to the apex of her thighs, pressing the long, pale fingers against her clit. 

 

“Touch me,” she said.  “Play with me.”

 

Delphine shifted to better reach, then slid her digits through the wet warmth of Cosima’s sex, circling her clit, and Cosima keened.  The French doctor began to move her fingers in a familiar rhythm against her beloved’s swollen bundle of nerves, experimenting just a bit until it seemed a soft, careful press and release against the base of the toy at the same time  was what the woman beneath her wanted.  She reached lower for a moment, teasing at the entrance of Cosima’s pussy, but her lover touched her wrist.

 

“No, that's too much, right now.  Maybe, like, another time. Just my clit, now, though, okay?”

 

“Okay,” Delphine agreed, and slid her fingers back up to tease at the small, responsive button again.  

 

They found a rhythm once more, and Cosima began cursing, and then saying “right there… right there” when Delphine scissored the slippery nub between two fingers, rapidly sliding against its sides.  Delphine breathed rapidly in time with Cosima’s mounting gasps, grunting a little, as well, as Cosima’s cries rose in pitch, cracked, and became breathier, until…

 

“Yes! … Yes!” A sound more breath and whistle than cry seeped from Cosima’s lips as she vibrated, coming.  Near the end, she thrust her ass back against Delphine’s still-gentle hand, pressing the toy into herself, and her vocalization dipped into a low and raspy groan.  Delphine shook a little in response, her clit bumping against her lover’s trembling thigh, but she continued to ride out Cosima’s signals, slowing her fingers and widening their spread, gentling her touch until Cosima finally rested her pelvis against the cupped hand that had been pleasuring her, her breathing coming deep and slower, slow…

 

“Uhh,” Cosima expelled after a moment.  Delphine couldn’t see her smile, but could tell she was from the rounding of her cheeks from the part of her face she could see.

 

“Yes?” Delphine smiled, too.

 

“Mmm.  Yeeessss.” Cosima nodded, and chuckled.

 

After a moment, she shifted a little bit, and Delphine rolled to her side to give her some room.

 

“I’m gonna take it out,” Cosima mentioned, “give me a sec.”

 

“Do you want help?” Delphine asked.

 

“Naw.  I’ve got this.  It’s easier, this way.  Just hand me the towel.”  Delphine glanced back to the night table and found the small piece of fabric, and Cosima gingerly removed the toy, allowing herself to relax to do so.  She wrapped it in the towel and set it on the floor with minimal shifting, then turned her head to look at her love.

 

“Well?” she asked.  “You okay?  You seemed okay with it, for sure.”

 

“Yeah,” Delphine nodded, dimpling.  She shifted closer to press a kiss to Cosima’s lips.  “It was very arousing seeing how… hot you got, how much you liked it… and touching you...”

 

“Mm, excellent,” Cosima grinned back, returning the kiss.  “Then we can do it again sometime.  Thank you.”

 

“Thank  _ you _ for opening up to me,” Delphine said, and she meant it.

 

“Are you okay? I’m a little… a little spent.  That always takes it out of me,” Cosima admitted, and Delphine shrugged.

 

“Yes, but… I think I will attend to myself, for a moment, alright?”

 

“Please do.  Be my guest,” Cosima chuckled.

 

Delphine slid out of bed and extricated the toy box.  Out from it came her new favourite vibrator: the one that pulsated in waves.

 

Cosima watched her avidly, if fairly limp with post-deep-orgasmic exhaustion, while Delphine laid back and brought the electric toy to life between her legs.  Cosima enjoyed watching the fluttering of her girlfriend’s eyelids, the shifting of her jaw and her lips into an O as she applied the device to her clit, the fingers of her other hand caressing her own chest, breasts and stomach.  The French woman’s breaths began to come in half-held gasps, and Cosima leaned over to kiss her shoulder, her collarbone, her closer breast, taking the nipple into her mouth and massaging it with her tongue as Delphine’s free hand twisted into her dreads and clenched.  A shudder of the hips, a sudden, tensing stillness, and an almost-laughing release, and Delphine was done, turning off the machine and putting it aside.

 

The snuggled for a bit, satisfied and slack.  They kissed.

 

“Shit.  That was hot.  You’re so fucking sexy when you touch yourself.” Cosima finally giggled, and Delphine smiled.  It wasn’t that long ago that she’d worried that Cosima’s mastrubating with a vibrator might mean Delphine hadn’t been paying enough attention to fulfilling her girlfriend’s desires, but now she felt comfortable, and even enjoyed watching and being watched.  She just liked learning about all the different ways they could pleasure each other.

 

“So, with the butt plug, is that how you usually like to do it?” she asked, fondly stroking Cosima’s face.

 

“Sometimes I like more, like, actual in-and-out fucking?  Even with a strap-on, maybe.  But a lot of the time, I just like being filled up that way.  It just hits me in a way other things don’t,” Cosima explained after a moment.  “It’s… deep.”  Delphine met her gaze and took it in, her grin was a little goofy, but her eyes were serious. 

 

“Then we’ll do it more often, when you want,” she said.

 

The shorter woman sat up, and grabbed the glass of water by the bed, taking a few gulps before passing it to  Delphine, who took a moment to prop herself up enough to sip it.

 

“I’m going to clean up a bit, baby,” Cosima said.  “You want to get ready for bed?”

 

“In a moment.  I’ll follow you,” Delphine nodded, finishing the water, and handing over the glass.

 

“Okay,” Cosima leaned down from where she had stood and kissed her again.  “One more thing?”

 

“Yes?” Delphine asked.

 

“Will you let me try more with your ass, too?”  

 

Delphine smiled indulgently.

 

“Yes.  Now get ready for bed.”

 

*****

 

It was sooner than Delphine expected.

 

It wasn’t that it hadn’t intrigued her, especially after Cosima had so clearly enjoyed the experience of having her ass filled.  It was just that her past experiences had been so lackluster.  She could definitely find it exciting in terms of how it got her lover off, now.  But for herself…

 

They made love another time, two days later, although it was shorter, and far more standard.  They both had work to do early in the morning.  It was sweet, and releasing, and wonderful, as always, but it was not a time for experimentation.

 

By Saturday night, however, Cosima was antsy.

 

“What?” Delphine asked her, as she was pressed against from behind, nearly toppling her into the dishwasher she was emptying.  She could feel the excited, impatient energy rolling off her girlfriend, and she chuckled.

 

“Honestly, if I don’t get to play with your ass soon, I’m gonna explode,” Cosima let out all at once, and Delphine was so blindsided her reactions got confused for a moment and she actually let out a snort.

 

“I don’t think we should pair the word ‘explode’ with that image,” she finally managed, turning around, and Cosima was so surprised and amused she let out an unseemly cackle.  Her mind quickly returned to the matter, however, as she wiggled against the tall blonde before her, wrapping her arms around to squeeze the bottom in question.

 

“Okay, but, so whaddaya think?  Are you up for it?  Tonight?”  She shifted, trying to ease back a bit.  “I mean, it doesn’t have to be tonight, of course.  I just…”

 

Delphine laughed.

 

“Alright, yes.  Let me relax a little bit, and clean up.”  She paused for a moment, tilting her head to the side, her eyes unfocusing a bit.

 

“What?  What are you thinking?” Cosima prodded.

 

“Well, I still don’t know if I will find it as enjoyable as I found doing it to you was,” Delphine allowed, after a moment.  “I suppose I… don’t want to disappoint you.”

 

“Aw, no,” Cosima insisted seriously, giving a small shake of her head.  “You never could.  I mean, I want it to be fun.  But I won’t be disappointed if you don’t like it.  I just want to try.  And if you don’t, we’ll do something else that you  _ definitely  _ like.”  She gave a cheeky wink, and Delphine chuckled.  “I mean, I’m not gonna leave you hangin’,” Cosima informed her, sounding extra Californian.  Delphine shook her head with a smirk.

 

“I’m sure you wouldn’t.”

 

She took time to relax.  She followed the directions for the anal douche, had a glass of wine, and took a bath.  She turned on some soft music and briefly got distracted planning her calendar for the next week.  Then she caught sight of a hopeful gaze from the other side of the room and chuckled.  She put down her phone.

 

“Alright.  You look so ready to experiment on me.”

 

“ _ With _ , not  _ on, _ “ Cosima corrected.  “This isn’t the bad old days.”  They could actually make jokes about that, now, their past at DYAD.  They had come a long way.

 

Delphine easily allowed herself to be led into the bedroom, where they moved into the rising heat of a close embrace and a delicious make-out session.  They fit so well together, having picked up on each other’s tells from the beginning: when to tilt one’s head, when to press forward, when to ease back, to brush softly, to get a little rough.

 

“God, I love your mouth,” Cosima exclaimed, the small smear of lipstick left around her lover’s lips matching what had transferred to her own.  Delphine surged forward a bit in that way that she did, serious and intent with hunger.  Cosima grasped the back of Delphine’s robe into a wad before she remembered she could actually remove it, and quickly untied the belt, shoving it off pale, smooth shoulders almost in offense that it existed.  She filled her hands with Delphine’s breasts, and the bitten-lip intake of breath in response only spurred her forward.  Soon she had her long, lean partner on the bed beneath her, open and responsive to Cosima’s kisses down her neck and hands massaging her hips.  There was always so much she wanted to do with Delphine, so much that tempted her, drawing her attention to different fancies.  She resolved to concentrate.

 

Softly, she guided them both to their sides, Cosima at Delphine’s back, running her hands from  where her head met her neck all the way down to her bottom, in long, slow strokes.  Delphine hummed in approval, curling into it a bit as Cosima took in the constellations of beauty marks on her lover's back, resisting tracing them this time to focus on making more soothing, sensual movements.  Over the course of their relationship, observing Cosima had convinced Delphine to add Pilates to her usual yoga routine, and her muscles had begun to be more prominent. Her biceps stood out more, and the long, flexing cords under the pale skin of her back made ripples when she shifted.  Cosima appreciated them, while slotting her fingers into the creases in a slow massage, working her way down to the divots in the small of Delphine’s back, and rubbing spirals around them with her thumbs.  Delphine hummed again, and Cosima could feel the the hips beneath her fingers flexing and loosening.  She continued to massage downwards, until her hands were working her lover’s glutes into warm relaxation.

 

“Hmmm,” Cosima let out lowly, her thumbs pressing and sliding along Delphine’s butt cheeks from the crack outward, spreading them just a little bit more each time.  She spread a smattering of kisses across the back of the shoulders before her and down Delphine’s spine, shifting lower so she could get a better view of her area of interest.  Wetting one pointer finger with her mouth, she gentle traced it from Delphine’s tail bone down the cleft of her ass, while kissing one her dimples of Venus.  She felt Delphine maybe take in a breath, but otherwise not move much in reaction.

 

“You know, you’ve got the cutest little bumhole,” she opined, and Delphine let out what sounded like a surprised chuff of laughter.  “I’m serious!  It’s like… totally this baby pink and perfectly shaped.  It’s like… if Botticelli painted a butthole.”  Delphine let out a real bark of laughter at that.

 

“That’s…  _ ridicule _ … I mean, it’s very flattering, but I’m not sure it’s turning me on,” she chuckled.  

 

“Fine, okay, I can see that,” Cosima acquiesced, “but it really is almost unfair. It’s like your pussy.  I’ve told you it’s like some kind of perfectly-shaped, pink flower.  Honestly, it’s one of the prettiest things I’ve ever seen.  I’d say it should be captured for posterity, but really, it would be unfair to all us other women…”

 

“Cosima,” Delphine reprimanded with a slight blush, “it’s just genitalia.  Every one is different and special in their own way.”

 

“Yeah, yeah, and they all serve a function.  I know that every one is beautiful in infinite variety, et cetera.  I mean, from a feminist textbook perspective, yeah.  But can I help it if I find yours particularly attractive?”  She lightly skimmed the edges of Delphine’s outer labia.  “And don’t tell me you’re in doctor mode, seeing just another body organ when you bury your face between my legs.  You like my pussy, too, don’t you?” She nipped at her girlfriend’s ass cheek with a grin, cupping her sex and giving it a squeeze.  

 

“Brat,” Delphine mumbled, but tilted her pelvis back to press against her lover’s hand.

 

Cosima responded by stroking her hand from the front of Delphine’s sex all the way back and up her cleft, lingering to run the pad of her pointer finger around said roseate ring.  Delphine stilled a bit at this, and Cosima found herself repeating the motion several times, her fingers hovering at the rear entrance but not doing more than stroking lightly.  She eyed the bottle of lube on the nightstand but didn’t reach for it.  She seemed to be evaluating, trying to read the taller woman’s body language.

 

“Is that okay?” she asked.

 

“Yes,” Delphine said, but her tone sounded noncommittal to Cosima, and she couldn’t see her face from behind her.  She paused.

 

“Are you okay?” Delphine echoed, slightly confused.

 

“I just… I’m trying to figure out what to do.  I was all excited about this, but I’m not sure I thought this through.  Now I want to introduce it in a way you’ll enjoy it.”  Cosima rose a bit on her arm to tilt over Delphine’s side and look at her.  Delphine turned a bit to meet her gaze.

 

“I’m enjoying being close to you,” she offered.

 

“Yeah but, the fingers on your butt?” Cosima inquired.  Delphine sucked her lower lip under her teeth for just a second, then responded.

 

“It’s alright.  It feels kind of nice, but…” she shrugged slightly, “I’m not used to it, or… overly turned on by it.”

 

“Okay,” Cosima nodded.  “Let me… let’s try something else.”  She gently tugged at Delphine’s hip until the blonde was on her back, then canted herself over her, pressing a slow, firm kiss to her lips, then her shoulder, then her breast, taking in Delphine’s involuntary sigh of pleasure when Cosima took her nipple into her mouth.  This was more familiar territory.

 

Cosima took some time working her mouth and hands over Delphine’s breasts, feeling the body below her beginning to move in larger, more dramatic waves.  She made her way down her lover’s torso, kissing and massaging as she went, to the junction of her legs, which had fallen open in invitation. Before long, she was sliding her tongue over a swollen clit and between those slick, petal-like lips.  Again she ran her fingers from Delphine’s pubis all the way to her rear entrance, and this time felt the small ring flex with a little pulse, but Delphine’s hips lifted upwards, pulling her ass away from contact and tilting her cunt closer.  Cosma took this in and then repeated the same motion, but this time with her tongue, shifting her fingers to press against Delphine’s clit and ending with a flourish of a lick around the French woman’s anus.

 

“Oh…” Delphine suddenly said.

 

“Mm?” Cosima questioningly hummed, placing a kiss against her amour’s asshole and just pressing lightly at it with the oral muscle emerging from her lips.

 

“That’s… that’s _ nice _ ,” Delphine said lowly, after a second of evaluation.

 

_ Aha _ , Cosima thought.

 

So she kept using her mouth: kissing, moistening the area with her tongue and rimming, pressing, using her hands to spread her lover’s cheeks.  But it was getting a little uncomfortable, angling down her neck, so…

 

“Here,” she said, twisting at Delphine’s hips until she flipped over, then drawing her to her knees.  Cosima had no compunction about lowering her head to the task.  

 

Delphine let out small moans, slowly loosening as what felt like an odd situation in comparison with her previous experiences began to feel less awkward and more pleasurable.  They picked up in intensity and frequency as Cosima dipped and then slid her fingers into Delphine’s cunt and began to fuck her slowly in time with the caresses of her tongue, her thumb slipping against the side of Delphine’s clit.

 

“Ah…  _ mon amour _ . Ah,” Delphine chanted, as the swath of erogenous zones between her legs was lavished with sensual attention in a building rhythm.  She could feel it all pulsing, now, her ass warmed and sensitized by Cosima’s mouth like it never had been before by other means.  She felt the sensation spreading, the sparks and spasms of the orgasm inside her pussy beginning in both complement and counterpoint to the wet heat against her backside. 

 

“It’s good…” she affirmed, as Cosma pressed more firmly against the clutching of her weeping cunt.  “It’s goooodohhhh…”

 

Cosima rode it out with her as Delphine pressed her hips into the mattress, bestowing little kisses on her lover’s ass as it twitched.  

 

They laid there for a moment.

 

“Yeah?  You liked that?” Cosima finally enquired, interrupting her own grin with a kiss to her lover’s butt cheek.

 

“Oui,” Delphine confirmed, rolling lazily over and drawing her partner up to hold her and give her a kiss.  She thought a moment.  “It felt very wet, at first, and… I think I wasn’t sure, but then it became very… relaxing, somehow.”

 

“Uh huh,” Cosima nodded.  They took each other in.

 

“I liked it,” Delphine said again, after a moment, small smiles gracing both of their faces.  “I would do it again.  It’s not something I ever thought of wanting, with anyone else, and I’m still not sure I’m into more penetration back there… but with your fingers inside me,  _ ma chatte _ ?  I liked the way you did that.”

 

“Nice!” Cosima grinned.  “Score one for rimming.”  

 

Delphine rolled her eyes a little in lieu of laughter.  

 

“Thank you for introducing me to something new,” she said, tracing the baby hairs at Cosima’s hairline fondly.

 

“Of course!  My pleasure,” Cosima beamed.  “Always happy to learn you’re just as much of a dirty girl as I am… although I suspected as much with the guy porn.”

 

“Yes, yes, you’re very perceptive,” Delphine scoffed lightly.  “And I hope my… Bottecellian blossom was all you hoped it would be.”

 

“Uh, that’s the bud.  The front part is the blossom,” Cosima deadpanned.  Delphine flopped her head back against the pillow and pushed her girlfriend away with a hand to the face.

 

“That’s it.  I’m brushing my teeth and washing up,” she informed her love.  “And I really need you to do that, also.”

 

Cosima responded with a snort and hopped up to join her girlfriend in the bathroom, barely refraining from making a  _ butt breath _ joke.  

 

Another night of exploration, and she was feeling good.  Everything had turned out wonderful… in the end.


End file.
